Seems like FOREVER since I've tracked my food, exercise, water................you name it, it hasn't happened.
I've been in this ugly place where I've been hiding all my emotions and medicating with food. It's been a giant pity party for one. Not a pretty place.
Now I'm to the point where I feel
miserable. But the first step back is recognizing where I'm at, even if it isn't a very pretty place.
So what to do?
Tonight I'm going home and cleaning out the refrigerator, work on meal planning for next week and putting lots of healthy, yummy items on the list. I'm tired of hijacking myself with false fixes that leave me feeling out of control.
I'm also going to go back to some basics that I used years ago when I was feeling lost.
Each day I'm going to do the following:
1. Do something for someone else.
2. Do something for myself.
3. Do something I don't want to do that needs doing.
4. Do a physical exercise.
5. Do a mental exercise.
6. Do an original prayer that always includes counting my blessings.
Tomorrow I'm getting on the scale, taking my measurements and logging them in - no matter how bad they are. I'm also going to track everything I eat and drink. If I don't log it how in the world am I ever going to know.
I keep hearing this whisper in my head saying "you know what you want, you know what you need. You can do this!" I just need to turn off/tune out the negative thoughts and just listen to the whisper.
As a Spark Friend of mine so elegantly puts it. "Love yourself and honor the life you've been given. Earn it. Treat your body as the sanctuary that it was meant to be. Fill it with all that's good and wholesome. Stay firm in your convictions; be good to others; and make a positive difference in others' lives. Hold onto that which will make you better and discard those things that hurt you. Be happy; fill yourself with laughter; be brave; live your best life; and dare to dream. And always remember....you can do this."