Thursday, November 29, 2012
The last couple of evenings I have been mindlessly nibbling . . whilst getting the kids dinner ready. I try reflecting - Am I hungry? What sounds good? the answers are vague.
I ended up having my dinner, rather than wait for my husband.
I think that what I was feeling was fatigue and low energy associated with the long hot (39C, or 102F) day.
When my husband got home I told him that some days I am not going to wait for him for dinner. If I am to be truly intuitive, I need to have more control over when I eat - and since hubby has not been getting home until 7.30 then he puts the kids to bed, we were not eating until after 8pm. I will wait if I can - but if I can't I will eat.
After dinner we always have a hot drink and a 'little sweetie' - normally a museli bar with a drizzle of chocolate on it, but sometimes a row of chocolate, or a cookie or two. Anyway, two nights ago I thought, actually I want some fruit - and last night I thought, actually I don't want anything. What? That has never happened. When I was tracking I was always tallying up what I had eaten in the day to see if I could have chocolate & a museli bar or just the bar. I never stopped to think whether I really wanted it.
I weighed in today. I decided to weigh monthly, and since we have friends coming over for dinner tonight, I thought I would weigh in today. (No point after a slightly bigger, and slightly more sodium containing meal). No change. That's right. No change to my weight. Its funny that I don't really feel anything about that, its more just an observation. I think I am actually getting to the point where I don't need the scale to validate my behaviours. I feel good, and my clothes fit, and when I look in the mirror I like what I see.
At the pool yesterday (first time for the summer), I could not help looking at some of the other bodies there. Some looked really fit, some not so much - it was not until I got a glimpse of myself in the mirror in the change room that I realised that the mental picture I had of myself was much less flattering than the truth.
Of course, December will be a challenging month for my intuitive eating. I just need to keep practicing these skills, and I will be fine.