Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Well here I am, back again. I have gained (back) 50 lbs in the past year and a half. I feel frustrated, ashamed and angry at myself. I am 9 lbs. shy of my all time heaviest. I can barely tie my shoes, my clothes don't fit, I get winded very easily, I have heartburn, feel tired all of the time, and my blood pressure is up again. I am miserable.
It's time to stand up, brush myself off, and solve this weight problem once and for all. This time I am gong to try to come at this a little differently. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes so I don't repeat them again. I know how to lose weight, it's the sticking with it and maintaining the loss that trips me up. So I'm listing the things that did and didn't work on my last attempt and failure.
Keeping it simple
Allowing all foods in moderation
Exercising a lot
Seeing other's success stories
Eating more vegetables, less starch
What Didn't Work
hating myself for being fat and wanting to eat
beating myself up because I was still fat despite losing weight
being impatient with myself and the whole process
being too strict
obsessing about food
reading diet books
setting my goal weight too low
Writing this down makes me realize that the impatience was probably the worst problem. I would get frustrated that I wasn't at my goal weight faster, then try to be be overly strict, and then rebound and start bingeing. Then after a while, I just gave up.
So I need to work on accepting myself with all of my flaws, and be patient with weight loss. If I stick with it long enough, I will make it happen.