Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Ate too much. Seem to do ok while at work, then get home and pig out on high fat, salty, and sweet stuff. Not working out. No energy, no motivation. Feeling down and wondering if it is even worth it. I am going to be 40 in April. My stomach is disgusting, had surgery in September to remove ovarian cysts, need another surgery for a hernia, so I have the mindset of "why bother". My breasts are the cliche of fried eggs nailed to a wall, and no amount of exercise will fix that, and I can't afford surgery.
My face keeps breaking out, even though my dr has had me on Doxycyclene for a year. My ob/gyn said perhaps the surgery for the cysts would help since it is hormonal, but it has been 2 months since the surgery and not only am I still spotting between periods (the whole reason I went to the ob/gyn in the first place and discovered I had cysts), but my face isn't any clearer. If anything, it is actually a bit worse.
So basically I feel depressed, unmotivated, and disgusting. I remember how awesome I felt when I was working out each day and eating so carefully, and I STILL can't bring myself to actually do anything about it. Now I feel bloated, fat, greasy, and exhausted. But with all the other crap that's wrong with my body I have to wonder...is it even worth it?