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    CMESPARK   9,232
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Motivation!


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

This Thanksgiving I got engaged- I'm thrilled and scared.

Not the standard, "do I really want this person in my life forever" scared, but the "how am I going to look in the wedding video and pictures" scared.

Shallow? Maybe.
But my life long experiences have always been this:

Whether its one week or 15 years after taking pictures at a happy occasion, I look at the pictures and I'm depressed. I think I look one way, and then I see the photos and I'm saddened by what I see. Worse yet, if I'm looking at pictures or watching the video of an event with others, I'm embarrassed. I spend more time trying to anticipate when I might be on film to distract from the tv or I cringe every second I'm the monitor.

My unhealthy weight is unavoidable.

Even if I'm happy in the picture, clearly I'm not healthy and not someone who is a good role model for my nieces.

I am scared cause I am a secret stress eater. Seems the more vigilant I am about what I eat, the more I want to eat.

As the stress of planning a wedding (our goal is to get married Memorial Weekend 2013- no I'm not pregnant just excited to get married) starts to add up, so too is my negative self talk and cravings for "something sweet"

I need to get this in check and FAST!
Anyone have any suggestions???
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
BONNIEBONNEAU 12/2/2012 5:48AM

    bonjour !
i want to congrad u , on finding a wonderful person to spend your life with !! PLEASE take this victory to heart ..do you know how hard that is ?? so give yourself some credit first!! emoticon

next - as for the pics ..i am the same way, i hate pics of myself. i try to avoid them all the time, because it shows , that hard cold truth , that we are overweight- thus here comes a solution ..SP and mind change emoticon

so take it from a slow loser ... if I may toot my own horn . 'the weight did not come onto the hips overnight, and it will not leave overnight' .set up some small goals - a new one every 3 months ?? , and do it !! (walking 3 blocks, then in 3 months walking 6 blocks) and food track , it works.. the stats prove it .

keep in touch - my blog is DixieinParis.com, where are u going for your honeymoon ?? emoticon

au revoir

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JLDACQ 11/28/2012 10:51AM

    Congratulations!!!! Ok, is this the guy you had been seeing sometime last year too? :-D

Being sad over what you see in those pictures isn't going to fix itself when you reach goal weight. Really. I'm not trying to bum you out, but it goes deeper than the outer surface of your body. I know you know that. Whether you were over 100lbs overweight, or within 5lbs of goal, what's in your head is what will decide your mood, and your view on yourself, even in pictures.

It'll take work, but I know you can learn to love yourself just the way you are FIRST, and once you have that, and you improve on what you have and who you are, you will become happy with the woman in those pictures, regardless of the dress size she wears. :-D

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DAWNWATERWOMAN 11/27/2012 9:24PM

    Use the trackers, get active on a team & get a good solid support system rolling. Then DO IT! Congratulations on your engagement. Remember, YOU are worth it!

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TRAVELGRRL 11/27/2012 6:23PM

    First of all, congratulations!

AND, remember that your fiance only sees the beautiful woman you are, not the excess pounds. So be grateful for him, and honor yourself for being such a great woman "despite" what you see as a flaw.

What would you tell yourself if someone else came to you with this problem?

I bet you would give advice similar to Christina's, below. I bet you would tell this person to relax, do her best, and not focus on being PERFECT. But even more, you have to dig deep and decide in your heart what's really important to you. Do you want to be thinner on your wedding day? Only you can control what you eat. It is up to you AND YOU CAN DO IT! (You already are!)

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CHRISTINA791 11/27/2012 5:30PM

    Congratulations!

I kickstarted my weight loss for similar reasons - I was determined to like my wedding photos. My advice would be to focus on the process and not the date itself or even a weight goal. I figured out that deadlines were death for me when I was on a perfectionst streak, because if I had one less-than-perfect moment, all I saw was the clock ticking and wasted time, which led to stress and panic. I think the reason I was able to hit my goal weight before the wedding was because I was just focusing on being better. I didn't give myself the pressure of a specific target, and because of that I worked harder to see how much I could accomplish before then.

I don't know if that makes any sense, but saying "I wonder how much I can lose by x-date" worked better for me than saying "I must lose x pounds by x-date".

Good luck!

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TXTOAD9970 11/27/2012 5:30PM

    Congratulations on getting engaged. You can put anything you set your mind to. It's only a six month commitment to buckle down and do your best to get in shape.
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ELIZABETH5268 11/27/2012 5:22PM

    Join a SparkTeam and maybe meet a buddy on here to keep you motivated. Or team up with your finace or a women you have in your wedding shower to lead up to the date to help keep you accountable.

I have a FitBit that I got about two weeks ago. I could not get motivated for fitness at all and this has drastically changed it.

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