Sunday, November 25, 2012
It has been nearly a month since I have blogged and what a month it has been.
I currently work at two jobs, which total 40-45 hours per week. Due to a co-worker at one job leaving for another job, I have been working over 50 hours per week and also attending several out of town training sessions, adding an additional 10-15 hours per week. Between the hours, the 200 mile (one way) drive for training and trying to keep up with the usual house-hold chores, there has been little time for much else. The money will be nice – especially now that we are into Minnesota’s heating season (temps already dipped below zero yesterday).
(SP needs to add a Burrrr emoticon)
Fortunately most of the training was held during deer hunting season and my son spends most of that time with his dad, so I didn’t have to feel guilty about not spending time with him. It has also led to a lack of time spent in my relationship with a man. We are still in the getting to know each other stage and have been taking things slowly due to the fact that he may have to move further away for work – or that our hours may cause time conflictions on top of the 130 mile distance between us. We are enjoying the time we can spend together, the long phone conversations and are taking things one day at a time.
Now I have agreed to take pictures of children and pets with Santa at a local mall every weekend through Christmas plus two evenings for a total of 46 hours. It will mean working seven days a week but with Christmas coming up and again the heating costs, I can use the money. My hope is to be able to give the heating company enough money to take me through the winter so that when my work hours go back to normal, I won’t have to worry about that.
I have also been going through a major emotional break-through. When my dad passed away, I couldn’t cry and had no idea why. I now think it was because I was trying to hold it together for everyone else. After attending the double funeral for my parent’s best friends (who died 51 days apart – he died two weeks before my dad and the family was waiting for her to heal from a broken hip to hold services when she passed away too) I pretty much let it go and cried and cried. Since that time other things that I have buried over the years have been coming to the surface. The smallest thing can trigger a large outburst of tears. This is a good thing because I need to get it out. The new man has really been there for me, doesn’t judge me and lets me get out whatever will come. For this reason alone, I know God brought him into my life. We may not end up a couple but we will always have a strong bond for what we are helping each other through right now (he is dealing with a lot too besides the work issue).
I had big plans for the long holiday weekend – finishing a lot of unfinished projects, putting out winter decorations, etc. Suffice to say, things didn’t go quite as planned. I did get the usual cleaning and laundry done, outdoor decorations are up and that’s about it. I think my body rebelled and said “give me some rest.” I have slept in the past four mornings and spent more time on the couch than I have in ages. My brain says “get off you butt and exercise or clean the basement” but the body refuses. I can’t say that I have felt overly guilty about it either – it really has felt good. I have watched movies, played on the computer, had a wonderful Thanksgiving Day with my family and had long conversations with friends on the phone. My butt will have to kick back into gear at 6:30 a.m. tomorrow and will have to keep going until Christmas. A benefit to Minnesota’s cold winters is that I will have plenty of indoor time to get those projects done after the holidays– MAYBE!