Sunday, November 18, 2012
I had been waiting all night for my bf to get home from work because I needed to run quickly to the bank machine before the morning. I had made a couple last minute deals on my local area swap sites and the 1st drop off/pick up is at 10 am. I also have to run in the morning to the grocery store and wasn't sure if I'd make it back in time to pay the lady if I was to get cash back so I figured I'd get the money out now and then if I don't make it back in time my bf could pay for me.
He got home around 11:30 so I right away ran up to the bank machine and on the way home I started thinking...Why is it that I tend to look straight down when I walk? Then I got thinking about when I walk on different days. Do I always walk with my eyes focused directly in front of me?? The answer was ya to some extent.
I got thinking more about this on my way home and I realized that some days I tend to look further ahead then others. When I have a lot on my mind or just having a bad day. I only look directly in front of me and not at all very far in front of me. On those one of a kind great days we have every once in a while I tend to look around more and I look ahead of me but not too far ahead.
Then I got thinking about other people I've encountered as I've walked in the past. Do they do the same thing? It's body language. Someone in a hurry walks fast and tends to look down. You don't think of them as friendly at all, not even bother a nod in their direction. People that tend to look forward when they're walking tend to come across more friendly, and you're more likely to say hi or nod when passing. These people can still be walking briskly but still seem friendly.
This realization made me think more about body language. I've been really down lately feeling like I'm isolated and that my friends don't really seem to have time for me unless I 1st ask them to make time. Maybe my body language is a contributing factor to all this, in fact it's most likely that it is.
I look down when I walk because subconsciously I just want to get from point A to point B and not be bothered. But if I feel lonely wouldn't I want to meet people? It seems strange to have my body language tell the world I want to be left alone when really I'm tired of being ignored!! I need to look forward!!
Something I've always struggled with is reaching goals. I have to keep everything very short term because I easily get distracted. Maybe this is in direct connection with not looking forward when I walk. I'm short-sighted because I've always been short-sighted.
Maybe the key to getting better at looking further ahead when it comes to my goals is to start by looking forward not just inwardly, but outwardly, if that makes sense. How can I think about something in the distance if I can't physically look at something in the distance without making myself do it.
Think about those that are runners and joggers. They don't run or jog looking at the ground in front of them - they look ahead in the distance. They don't think about where they are, they look to where they are headed. The only time I've seen a runner or jogger look to the ground in front of them is when they feel defeated and they're ready to give up.
I need to train my brain to look ahead without thinking about doing it. I need to have that come as second nature. If I ever want to feel confident and if I ever want to be able to focus on what's ahead and actually make it to the finish line without accepting defeat...I need to look forward and to keep looking forward.
After I had thought about the various things on my walk home - I tried to look further ahead and to keep looking ahead. It's harder than it sounds!! Everytime my mind wandered, my eyes would focus in front of me again. It's going to take some getting used to but I'm going to take this as a challenge and I'm going to change the way I walk =]