Friday, November 16, 2012
Wooh, just had a big breakfast full of whole grains and protein. That should get me through the day!
I'm going on a self-imposed retreat soon. Tomorrow I'm going to spend about half the day in silence and meditation. I'll light some incense and read some of my best Buddhist books. I have to or I am going to lose my mind. I've gotten so wrapped up in my own thoughts I'm driving myself nuts. I feel hyper-stimulated. Honestly, a lot of it is politics and arguing with other people online and in my head. I am so passionate about these issues but I also hate conflict - it's a horrible combination. Even listening to NPR on the way to work is getting me riled up lately. I'm thinking of declaring a moratorium on political discussions for a while. I hate the divisiveness and negativity. I hate it. See, I'm stressing myself out just thinking about it.
I've been trying to bring awareness to the experience of making healthy changes. The hunger seems to be getting better every day. Yesterday I even had room in my calorie budget for a can of ginger ale. I'm starting all over with Spark People stages - back to Fast Break. My first Fast Break goal is to eat a healthy breakfast every day, and so far so good.
I love evidence-based living, but I think this time around I'm not going to worry so much about taking advice from experts and instead really find what works for me. Eating low carb may be recommended by a lot of experts, but in the morning I find slow-burning carbs keep me full longer. I've been sticking to things like whole grains, oatmeal and buckwheat for breakfast. And snacking throughout the day - I'm trying to get away from that. I don't want to eat 5 small meals. I'd rather just eat three times a day. The less I'm thinking about food, the better. I'm not forbidding snacking or anything, I'm just working to make it as unnecessary as possible.
I guess, I'm trying to find ways to fill up my life that don't involve food. So much of my time is spent eating. I want to spend more of that time living.