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grocery shopping as a marital exercise?

Thursday, November 08, 2012

I take care of the menu, the cooking and the shopping. I have a system that involves sales, produce, recipe searches and takes a good portion of my Saturday. I ENJOY THIS. My husband has decided that he gets to come, to see where we can save money. I am not looking forward to him approving each purchase, and arguing over ever decision, which is what this will turn into. He has determined that I need to slash the budget in half. I feed three teenagers, one who goes through a gallon of milk a day. I am not reducing our milk and produce consumption. I am not going to buy pre-processed crap to save money. I did suggest that we could stop buying beer, and coffee singles for him. He wants me and the princess to switch to generic lipton tea that he bought in bulk and is now stale, instead of the good tea we can only buy at Safeway. He is anti safeway, even though I shop the sales, and usually save about 20%, and earn gas points which helps as I am fueling three vehicles, and that also comes out of the grocery bill. He wants to shop at grocery outlet and wal mart. I hate Wal mart. It's dirty, and the produce has to travel from Mexico to Washington state. He is not going to let me buy organic. I am going to go call him names will I drive around town and get these weeks flyer's so I can shop the sales. It's not that I don't understand we need to save money. I get that, I really do, and I am aware that my recent job switch costs us $200 a paycheck. But I need some creative cooperative brainstorming, not Gestapo dictator tactics.

So, it's 2;30, two hours into our shopping experiment. I printed the list, the coupons and menu, and then it was off to the first of three stores. Not so bad, he doesn't linger or wait while I say hello to the same people I see everyweek doing the same thing, but he didnt rush me, either. He questioned a few things, but I usually said " it's the healthier version" or "I eat it at work." He would sigh when I would double check a price, or bring out the calculator to check something. I didn't complain when he put the three bulk sizes of frozen potatoes, because they will eat them, and it will last us a month. We have finished the three stores, with two left. It was a bit more than normal. He is in sticker shock. "How could it cost so much?" I ask him if he thought I was being frivolous, or wasting money, and he said no, so i asked him what the point of this exercise was, and he said he just needed to learn how much things cost. His theory is that it's the weeknight quick stops that due the budget in, but those are limited to milk and fresh produce and little things that the kids need through out the week. I am now going to go to safeway and get the rest of the stuff, and the bread store by myself. I don't think he enjoyed himself and probably wont do it again.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Oh my! I really feel for you, MRSKATEDUVALL, on the occasion of your Marital Exercise in Shopping. Yes, I empathize with you and your SparkFriends who commented. More than once I cringed as I read along as I have been there. More than once I had a LOL moment, also because I have been there.

    I call my shopping day, my Food Gathering day. It is really quite an ordeal. Like you I gather the recipes, the coupons, examine the circulars, map out the "hunt," shop, and then once back home safely in one somewhat frazzled state, I divide some of it up into portions, put it all away, and then cook dinner! Whew!

    Lately, I've even been getting better at starting by putting it all together into a written menu instead of a plan just in my head.

    Sorry, but don't let anyone question either my food receipts or my dinner the day of Food Gathering. I'm not in the mood after all the effort! And yes, inevitably, if my DH goes along on the shopping trip, it is inefficient and we spend/waste more $!

    It seems like you experienced some positives with your Marital Exercise Shopping. Your DH got to see first hand how much food costs and the effort you go to to buy healthy food in a cost conscious way. WooHoo to you, MRSKATEDUVALL!

    1742 days ago
  • DEBBY4576
    When I do coupons, and ad matches and all the ads in the paper searches and then go to the store, my husband better not be there with me. I can not be distracted. Do they realize how much time and energy it takes to just get ready to go? And I have to pay careful attention that the price I have written down is the price of the item I'm buying. YOU CAN NOT AND SHOULD NOT BE DISTRACTED!!! Come on now, enough's enough.
    1746 days ago
    Oh dear I hope it all works out for you. emoticon
    1746 days ago
    hope you can go alone otherwise it will be so difficult
    1746 days ago
    You do have a challenge on your hands! I hope it works out okay for you both!
    1747 days ago
    Yikes! I spend hours with coupons, sales comparisons and mapping out my route also. Leaving hubby at home is my best money saving measure though! Any way you can shop when he is at work? Some guys just do not have a money saving mentality. Oh, they want money saved alright. But, doing their part is not involved. With coupons, etc, I saved 48% off our bill last week. No beer though!
    Other than shopping without him, I am not sure what to offer. Maybe ask him to go online and spend the hours needed to find coupons for what you need? One time of that and my hubby thought differently about the whole process.

    I hope you can go alone... emoticon
    1747 days ago
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