Sharing my ramblin thoughts
Thursday, November 08, 2012
SparkCoach action plan was to share my story, as a way to inspire myself and others. I am afraid I wont be very inspiring. I am struggling. I started the initial phase of my healthy journey with time off from work, to deal with my out of control diabetes. I got it under control, and lost weight and returned to work after 6 weeks last December. Since then, I have maintained my blood sugar control, but have struggled to lose any weight. I have lost and gained the same 10 lbs since March, when I joined Spark People. I know that health is more than the scale, so I track my blood glucose, and have seen it stay in control. My last A1c was 5, which is close to perfect...and that it the word I struggle with. Perfection. I have this view of how my day is going to go, I have a plan A.. when something goes awry, I don't always have a plan B. This is the main thing I am struggling with. I run into many obstacles along my day, and I need to learn a way to deal with them, without reverting to my old bad unhealthy habits. An example is exercise. If i don't have time to treadmill for an hour, or lift weights for 45 minutes at the gym, I revert to old bad couch potato mode and do nothing. GOOD versus BAD... it's the second thing I am struggling with, closely related to perfection. I need to learn that there is no bad, that there is moderation. thinking of something as bad leads to feelings of deprivation, and then I rebel and eat ALL OF IT. I am dealing with night time binging. It's better on days where I eat in my calorie range, and leave room for a bedtime snack. I can generally sleep through the night then. But if I eat all my calories during the day, and don't have any after dinner, my blood sugar crashes and I find myself awake at 3 am, eating. Lowering my insulin dose has helped some, and my goal is to wean myself off insulin, and not renew my script. I know that I can control my diabetes through diet and exercise. Which is the next struggle I have. Controlling my sugars through diet requires strict measuring. I have fallen away from weighing and measuring and I think it is the main reason I haven't lost much weight. I got my measuring spoons out this morning. What will help is looking up food before I eat it, to see the units that spark-people has for tracking, and then sticking to them. SO.. here is my story, and my renewed action plan.
I am going to work on balance at work, not letting the 10 hour days turn into 12 hour days. I will overcome the daily obstacles by always packing my food with me, and will remember to carry my food bag with me. I will pack a pair of gym socks and my walking shoes with me, so I can take 10 minute walks to break up the day. I will weigh and measure my food, so I know with certainty what I am tracking is honest. I will work on the 80/20 rule, and learn moderation and balance. If I am in control, eating fruit and vegetables, with one grain and one meat a day, 80 % of the time, I can have 20%, every-once in a while, without the guilt and throwing in the towel for the whole day. My tools to success- daily tracking on my phone app, my fitbit step tracker, and spark-people when I have time, which with my new job and the new supervisor who reinforces the no internet policy at work, will be hit and miss at home. I am hoping santa could bring me a IPAD for Christmas, but I think that the budget will prevail and santa can bring me new running shoes and extend the gym membership which I will need.