Tuesday, November 06, 2012
I never thought about this part of losing weight. My comfy clothes are too big. I look like a clown in my too big jeans. Not just one pair, but now 2 pair have hit the give away pile.
I got those jeans from my Aunt Linda back in May. She gave me about 6 pair. I was so happy to have so many to choose from. I hate shopping for clothes because I can never find a pair that fit right unless I go to the fat woman's sections. (I know, the politically correct name is the "plus size" section but this is my blog so I'll say it like it is.) Then I buy a pair I can live with even if they don't fit just right, as long as I can button them and they'll give my big thighs a little room. I'm lucky if I can find even one pair.
Anyway, my choices are shrinking and I'm realizing - I might have to go shopping. This is not good. I'm sort of scared by it. Almost enough to wonder if I should stay the size I am now so I don't have to face it. First the search for a store that will even sell my size. Then digging through the scarce choices that do exist. Then dragging them all into the dressing room to squeeze and fight my way into them. Then coming out and letting someone else see what they look like. THEN spending all the money. OMG it's overwhelming.
I know being healthier is worth it. But for the first time in my life I had a closet full of clothes that fit. Now they don't so well. I hate the thought of building it up again.
This may sound silly to you, but this is intimidating. I just never really thought about it when I started this. I still have clothes, I mean my tight jeans are fitting really well now so I have some time. It's not like I'll be naked any time soon. I just don't want to say goodbye to my jeans that still have lots of life still in them!
I guess I can go to Goodwill and dig through those racks more often.
And maybe, just maybe, someday I will be able to shop at Old Navy or one of the regular stores and know exactly what my size is.