Sunday, November 04, 2012
As a child I was always fascinated with words. Words have the ability to encourage, inspire, relate every feeling known to man , words can be used for the best or the worst of intentions. For this reason the quote " the pen is mightier than the sword" has always been my favorite. I dont mean to sound conceded here but My mother always said that my words had the ability to grow flowers in the heart or put a knife threw it, just depended on how I wanted you to feel. Words are the colors on which rainbows are formed.
A friend gave me a book for my birthday called " South of Broad". So I have been reading this book; however, very slowly because the book has so many beautiful words that I never knew. He paints such a wonderful picture that I get lost in his daydream . Now this is only important because two of his words I had to look and find the meaning of this morning and well they kinda fit today.
There are things that thin bodied women get to do that well I have thought were never possible for me as a fat bodied woman. One of which is wear a man's shirt in that oh sexy way . I know not every woman thinks this is sexy: however if you dont have the ability to decide then well it is always there as a negative thing. When I married my husband some 15 years ago I was 5'9" and probably easily heading to 300 pounds. I wore a very plain unattractive white blouse that well although it fit in some places in others it was well to tight like the neck and arms but there again I was always a size 26 right (wink) as long as i could say well hell I didnt have a weight issue I was just big boned. The skirt was of the mauve color again not flattering at all .. I was a 26 year old mother of two young boys so who cared if my breast ran right along with my stomach I certainly didnt. My husband well I wish I could say he was the blond hair blue haired hunk but well he was blonde hair and blue eyes 6' 3" and all of a 150 pounds soaking wet ... We were a fine couple I tell you. I am sure you are confused at this point what this all has to do with anything lol .
Well as some read in my last blog I have been having some rough days since my surgery almost 7 weeks ago. And this week well I had to log a 3 pound gain ( rolling my eyes as I type it ). Feeling a little less than discouraged I was getting dressed this morning and reached into the closet and pulled out one of my husband's Pittsburgh Steelers tee shirts. It is one I ordered off line for him because we are huge Steeler fans even in the home of the Saints. This lead to the most prodigious of moments. Of course now he is 6'3 weighs 240 pounds so it is a 2x but still it fits like a man shirt would on a woman .. it is loose in all areas to which I have never done before in my life well except when I went and bought a man's 5x shirt a few years back to sleep in. I know it doesnt seem like much but to me is was splendiferous . I might not be where I want to be right now but I sure am not where I use to be either. Now although I am still a fat bodied person I am also a slimmer inches wise than I use to be. And as hard as it is to believe because I really am my own worst enemy I actually like me except this stomach if it would leave the rest could stay and I would actually be perfect to me lol.
This morning I put the scales away out of my bathroom and I will not weigh till next Saturday morning. Also I have gotten really accustom to my coffee of comfort again also, so starting tomorrow I will try to get it back to three cups of coffee a day. Yes I know that is still a lot but you really dont want to be around if i drink less than that. All I can ever do is be true to my health and the process that got me this far, so all things considered I am not to bad off .. After 6 weeks on this couch I have only gained 4 pounds so that is not as bad as it sounds considering all the ostentatious moments spent here on this miserable piece of furniture .