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Alien invasion

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Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Yesterday to go to the doc's I put on a skirt I haven't worn for about four weeks and took it off again, fast, before it fell off. It's ankle length anyway but the waist now sits on my gut (still plenty of that there for it to sit on) and three inches of hem trail on the floor. It's now on the way to the recycling bin, along with the skirt I did wear to the doc's because I trod on the hem of it going up the stairs and tore an eight-inch hole in it. Monday was what you'd call a bad skirt day.

I'm getting nervous to be honest. Most of my other wardrobe staples from the summer are getting baggy. I am keen not to give myself room for backsliding, so I am getting rid of them as I shrink out of them. But horror of horrors, what if I put all the weight back on? What WILL I wear? It's so hard to find decent clothes in big sizes. Every time I consign another garment to history, I feel I'm burning another boat.

Have faith, I keep telling myself, in the things that will ensure you do not backslide. The support of SparkPeople, your own determination, the fact that in spite of everything, your whole attitude towards food has undergone a fundamental shift.

For shift it certainly has. I know I've said this before, but I can't believe how differently I am viewing being on SP as compared to other plans I've followed. The biggest difference is the lack of pressure. There is NO pressure. You spark your own way, in your own time. You set your own goals, and you revise them as and when you choose. If you have a bad patch, even if it lasts a couple of weeks or a month, it's just that: a bad patch. A sparkfriend may remind you that you were not intending to eat that packet of biscuits but you know and the friend knows that next week you'll be reminding her of the same thing. There isn't a group leader fixing you with a beady eye at a weekly meeting and wondering if you're going to bring her average down and that's wonderful. You're not paying £5 a session to be patronised. Loud cheers for that too.

I set myself the goal of size 18 by Christmas and I've got no idea whether or not I'll get there. I set this goal so that I could go shopping in the sales after Christmas and buy a new wardrobe but to be honest I don't want to buy too many things in size 18 either.

At present I have some clothes size 20 and some size 22 and some size 22 that STILL aren't big enough. I keep trying them all on and seeing what's now wearable. Some bits of me have shrunk more than others. My hip measurement is decreasing so rapidly that pretty soon I'll be a perfect cylinder in shape, without any difference in my waist measurement at all. On the positive side if I go to France on holiday I'll be able to buy bolster covers and wear them as dresses. My upper arms, though, for some reason, are still as porky as ever. Argh, because I have a really nice blouse, a long knitted coat and a cashmere jumper on which the tight arms are the sticking point. So I want to get fat off there and replace it with muscle.

Here's another thing. I've been sitting around at home feeling yucky, but also dying to get round to the gym. I know it's a bad idea at the moment - I really need to get over this bug first - but come the weekend there I'll be, pounding the treadmill and the thing you wheel with your hands (it's a bit like a handheld bicycle - you almost expect a clown outfit to wear when you're using it) to get my flabby upper arms in order.

What I'm saying is being ill has really irritated me because I haven't been able to take the exercise I wanted to and it has got in the way of my Spark progress.

Is this really me talking?

Perhaps I've been taken over by an alien.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    emoticon emoticon
    1941 days ago
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    1957 days ago
  • NLYR20
    emoticon That will be our Mantra.
    1958 days ago
    I have been on this program for several years and the most exciting thing that I remember is the day that I dropped the 18W to a real exciting. I started aout at 24W which was very uncomfortable, but I was there. Sparks is my way of doing things. I eat according to my personal plan, real food, fresh fruits and veggies etc., It has worked for me. It is wornderful to know that you have no intention of go backward. Have a great journey
    1962 days ago
    You'll be fine as long as you remember your goal. Keep at it!
    And congrats on your progress. Can very much relate to your thoughts (just at a different size).
    And if the arms are flapping too much: paint a flag on it and flap them proudly! ;-)
    Happy 1st of November! Hugs.
    1964 days ago
    Have no fear! SP has a great "At Goal and Maintaining" group. Remember, it's not a diet, it's a way of life. You'll be fine if you keep tracking and being honest with yourself. Hang in there!
    1965 days ago
    You are doing SO GREAT!
    1966 days ago
  • 52114ME
    You go Girl!

    I know the feeling....being impatient to get back on the exercise plan.
    Keep that inner fire burning!
    1966 days ago
    Thank you for sharing. Keep up the work on you for you. Every little positive thing is good for you. You can do it and keep it up. emoticon
    1966 days ago
    If it was me I would be scared happy....which I know you are. Great job...keep it up.
    1966 days ago
    emoticon Yep,I understand the I-scared-I-will-have-nothing-to-wea
    1966 days ago
    1966 days ago
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    1967 days ago
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    1967 days ago
    All right, I hereby declare that by the temporary, imaginary powers that haven't actually been given me, you have irrevocable permission to get rid of any garment you shrink out of in an absurd and ridiculous fashion. (I mean get rid of them ridiculously, not shrink out of them ridiculously, though that might be funnier). Set them on fire in your barbecue, make a skinny kite and cut them up to be the tail. Braid the lgs of your big jeans together to make a dog toy for a canine friend. If you know you have a gag gift exchange coming up, weave some strips into a long scarf and Merry Christmas! Any made of natural fibers can be composted. And let me put in a vote for my personal favorite: do to them anything your mother would have thrown a fit over: bleach, scissors, wear them to paint in, make a Halloween costume out of them, use them as a dartboard/archery target. The point is, they're just clothes, they don't define you, you define them. Have more fun out of them than you did in them. (that kinda sounded dirty, but I swear it wasn't.) emoticon
    1967 days ago
  • REENIE131
    You're doing GREAT!
    1967 days ago
    Yeah! So excited for your progress! U r truly a SP Person now - way to go! :) get better soon too!
    1967 days ago
    WOW! I have the same problem, except that I still have not moved off of size 22 yet. I want to be 18 by Christmas (size, not age).
    1967 days ago
    You're doing so great. I related so much to your reluctance and fear about giving away the old big clothes. I struggled mightily with that. I felt like I was tempting fate by giving away the clothes after I grew out of them. As if.....I would gain all the weight IF I gave away the clothes. Dumb, I know. But maybe, I reasoned, if I didn't have those clothes to fall back on, it would provide more motivation not to regain. So eventually I gave most of them away. There's still a few in my spare closet. I have so many reasons NOT to go back to where I was--Health, Energy, Moving, and CLOTHES too. Hope it all works for both of us!!!
    1968 days ago
    emoticon !!!!!
    Hope you exceed the goal by Christmas
    1968 days ago
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    1968 days ago
    emoticon marvelous. emoticon emoticon
    1968 days ago
    Good for you!!! Sounds like you have a plan and you are sticking to it - that is the road to success. Do you have a Bon Worth store in your area? You can still get slacks for $10.00 in multitude of colors. All are elastic waist and they go up to X-Large, but I do not know what number size that computes to.
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    1968 days ago
    It is so good to ste that goal. Take it one step at a time and i know you may even surpass your goal emoticon emoticon
    1969 days ago
    I was enjoying your blog, expecting in my mind a person who had gone from a size 14 to an 8, a petite person holding up her "big" pants like on TV. So, it really helped me when you talked about fitting into a 22, 20, 18. It REALLY IS A BIG DEAL! I get overwhelmed by having so much weight to lose, it seems like 10-20 lbs or a size or two are insignificant in the big picture. But it is significant, it's time to CELEBRATE! Thank you.
    1969 days ago
  • WISDOM73
    You have been very ill, your body just needs to recover. I understand your urge to get back to it but just consider there was a slight delay. As for the clothes, if need be there will be some available and please do trust yourself and your new way of life! emoticon
    1969 days ago
    You are making good progress. Thank you for sharing.
    1969 days ago
    Hurray for clothes that are too big! emoticon
    1969 days ago
    Fantastic attitude & great job on the progress. Hope you're over the bug and back to the gym in no time!
    1969 days ago

    Graphic evidence of changes and all seem very positive.

    Easier to re-clothe in successively smaller sizes, than it is to burn-off the excess weight.

    I'd take it all as postive, positive, positive . . .

    1969 days ago
    That's a great feeling when the clothes start to fall off! Hope you get over your bug!
    1969 days ago
    good for you! emoticon
    1969 days ago
  • DSIMS8
    Thanks for sharing!! I too have been sick the last couple of weeks. I had to force myself back in the gym a just did very light work outs for the last week, trying to build back up. Slow but sure wins the race as my mom used to say! Keep up the good work-good luck! emoticon
    1969 days ago
  • BRONZE50
    1970 days ago
    I say get rid of the oversized clothes - you don't want to be able to go back to them! I often find smaller clothes at Good Will - although sales work well too.
    Congrats on your progress!
    1970 days ago
    Hey, I know how you feel when you wonder all these things, so I'll try to add some perspective -

    Getting rid of clothes - you found larger sizes before, so if you really HAD to, you would find them again. But you won't need them, so let's not worry about what would happen if you gained weight.

    Sizes - I have four sizes in my closet, and some so old they might even be a smaller size than what's on the tag considering how much clothing sizes have changed in the last decade. What really matters is not the number, but how they fit. It's hard for all of us not to be stuck on those numbers, but know that soon you will be out of the 20's altogether no matter the manufacturer/designer.

    der or Rectangle - even at my thinnest I have no waist. I've finally come to terms with it. Great book that tells us how to dress for our body type no matter what our size (a real eye-opener for me!!!). If the link doesn't work, the book is called "The Science of Sexy."

    Missing Exercise - how nice to be an alien, eh?!?!? I wonder when I'll get to the point where I'm upset that I only ran 3 miles (I don't run).

    Congrats on the great changes you are making to your attitude and body! And thanks for sharing!!
    1970 days ago
    Keep the workouts light but consistent while you are not feeling well, and emoticon . You ARE making progress, the baggy clothes tell the tale! Keep the positive outlook and take a look at SparkPeople videos for ideas on how to work those arms! (they are one of my trouble spots, too, but my family tells me they see a difference, and most of my workouts are from their videos/demos). emoticon emoticon
    1970 days ago
    Getting rid of clothes that are now too big for you is planning for future success instead of failure. Keep one thing from your largest size to show how much you have lost when you get to your goal weight. Other than that, let go of where you were to get to where you want to be!

    Great work!

    1970 days ago
    How awesome for you! That is such a great feeling when the clothes are getting to the point where they are falling off of you! Keep up the great work!

    1970 days ago
  • BANDMOM2012
    Thrift and consignment stores help you make the most of your money on this life changing journey. That is awesome that you are seeing results. Keep it up!
    1970 days ago
  • BUSMOM27
    1970 days ago
  • NEWMOM20121
    Great blog. Keep up the good work. You can do it.
    1970 days ago
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    1970 days ago
  • AJB121299
    1970 days ago
    1970 days ago
    you are doing beautifully! i am so happy for you!
    1970 days ago
  • 1935MARY
    Great job.Keep some of your clothes, sew them,get rid of the others,buy a few for Christmas as a reward of a job well done. To me if I kept the old ones for just in case I put the weight on , I would be telling myself I was going back to my old habits. So when my day comes I will get rid of them a little at a time and replace a few and when I get to my desired weight then I emoticon will get rid of all of them and I'll buy me allot. I may keep a pair of jeans for awhile to remind me of where I was.When you have four seasons of clothes, you don't have to replace them all at once. Your blog was very inspiring. Thanks for sharing.
    1970 days ago
    Give it time
    1970 days ago
  • SPEEDY143
    CHANTAL said... 'Most of my other wardrobe staples from the summer are getting baggy." emoticon 'nuff said emoticon
    1970 days ago
    For clothes that getting baggier, either you adjust them into right size (I recommended sewing the extra fabric not cutting, just in case) or keep them as backup somewhere in storage area or you can donate to others and buy new clothes! For me, I always do option #1 and #2 as I'm not quite confident with myself to losing more or maintain the new body LOL

    I hate get sick but lately, that's what I always have (fatigue+headaches+slightly runny nose+a bit feverish), my body feel much more weaker when I try to do workouts that I usually have no problem with.
    1970 days ago
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