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    MDKM80   7,228
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My self worth?

Friday, October 19, 2012

My weight is a huge stressor for me. It consumes me day and night and has for years. I compare myself to other women I see and it drives me crazy as I find myself lacking in all areas of body image. I find my own self worth is wrapped up in my idea of what I should look like against what I actually do look like.

Last night DH took me out to the store, as the weather is getting cooler and my clothes aren't fitting properly I wanted to get a nice cardigan. I found one in a 1X (I was fitting into a 3X a few weeks go) and tried it on, it was a little tight but not uncomfortably tight I was elated, overjoyed, thrilled, all those lovely words! Until I got to the mirror that is and did a 360 degree turn to see what it looked like on. All my joy about what I have been doing for myself went out the window fast. I was beaten down last night emotionally. I haven't looked in a full lenght mirror for so long that when I finally did I became instantly depressed and angry,

That is the typical daily stress that I go through about my self image. I'm generally a happy person up beat and positive, about other people and their lives while I stress about my body and how others generally see me as. I've been doing better and these challenges help, but it's stressful.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BIGPAWSUP 10/19/2012 10:43AM

    You are a wonderful, caring person and you are BEAUTIFUL! We are all unique - that's what make life so fun. Don't compare yourself to anyone else, you are NOT them. Enjoy and be happy in who YOU are. And if you need to compare, pull out a picture of 3X girl and see how far you've come!

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