Thursday, October 18, 2012
OK here's the deal "You don't want to be bamboozled. You don't want to be led down the primrose path! You don't want to be conned or duped. Have the wool pulled over your eyes. Hoodwinked! You don't want to be taken for a ride. Railroaded!"
I got bamboozled... I got taken down the primrose path... hoodwinked and duped.
On our way home from a recent visit to St George, middle of the night, kids asleep, husband sleeping... tired eyes. So I pulled over and walked into the brightly lit temptation palace, we call a convenient store. Overpriced candy, chips, and a whole lot of naughty temptations for the palate.
I wanted something to wake my mouth up, something chewy, something that will last the next 2 hours. So as I scanned the endless shelves scouring for what might fit the profile of my needs I was attracted to Twizzlers. Yes Perfect! A nice bag of Twizzlers... red vines nowhere to be seen in the vicinity I decided twizzlers ought to do justice... even though mind you they are not my favorite candy in the world.
So I ate them, but I am a slow eater on these things. A week later at work, I was nibbling on what was left. Down to 2. I eat one. Thinking "man these things so taste like plastic, should have gotten red vines.Oh well." Now I am down to my last bite. I put it in my mouth and as I reach to throw away the wrapper, it dawns on me. It was like the packaging was laughing at me. Taunting me.
"I thought... noooooooo they wouldn't have. Why would they have gluten in them, they look like plastic, they look like pure gelatin. Oh dear I don't think I read the label that night."
So I decided to ease my fear while I chew the last bite. My chewing stopped immediatly as I read the second ingredient was WHEAT FLOUR! My next thought ran with "DAMN it you have to be kidding me! I am chewing wheat right this second. Ive already had like 10 so I might as well swallow this last bite now." But you know what? I did something more shocking. I spit it out, right on top of the laughing, packaged menace, in the trash.
You see it is one thing to accidentally eat the gluten without knowing it... but even on the last bite, I had a choice. I could knowingly swallow what I know was wrong or do the right thing for me and spit it out. To me it was the difference of being beaten, or beating IT.
I was angry and flustered that how dare I eat something without reading the label. I was mad that whatever trained my brain into thinking I can see gluten, made me think I dint even need to look at the label. A million things out there look like "non" gluten filled yet they are. I know this yet I fell for the little red package luring me into its grips!
Ok yes, sure a particularly dramatic description, but I had to make it dramatic to send a message to my brain not to ever make that mistake again. I have been gluten free for 6 weeks now and I have evaded temptations over things I truly enjoyed, so to be taken over an item that I don't even love, was aggravating.
I called my sister later to tell her and she laughed and said, "all of us got rail road-ed by twizzlers. Don't worry you aren't the only one."
That made me feel better.
On an up note... 17 lbs down hurray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Clothes fitting better, and I continue to feel so more alive! I think gluten caused my nerves to fall asleep. So now they are WIDE awake and experiencing life.
So now I moved on and feel thrilled that I was able to control the part in me that said YOU FAILED, EAT IT ANYWAY! By spitting out that last bite gave me a stronger resolve. Knowing I will unknowingly make mistakes on this journey, but I will learn from those mistakes and pick myself up stronger and faster than I ever have before.
I have confidence now. To overcome even the trickiest gluten bamboozelers:)