Monday, October 15, 2012
Wow I really can't believe that it's been 2 months since I've been on SparkPeople. That's crazy. :( I have really missed it. My computer was broken for a while but honestly I had stopped logging in way before that. I have really been struggling a lot. Ever since I moved out here to the middle of nowhere I have been fighting just to keep my head above water. Luckily my weight has remained constant at about 210. But I could have been at my goal weight by now. :-/ I'm trying to not get too depressed but it's proving really hard. I hate my job. I hate where I live. I dated a really nice, sweet, great guy for a month before he decided to throw me to the curb & date other women. I just feel like I'm taking hit after hit here & I'm tired of it. I want my old spirit back! I get it back sometimes for brief periods & I'll be doing really good until something happens & I get all upset again & just go back to my regular routine. I just feel overwhelmed all the time. I really wish I was one of those people that quit eating when I was depressed or stressed but I'm not. I am a stress eater for sure as I've written about before in my last blog. I just feel like I have so much stuff that I need to be working on & I don't even know what to do first. I want to get to my goal weight so I want to diet. But I also want to go out & be with people & that usually involves food or alcohol or both which is not so conducive to dieting. Then I need to be trying to figure out what I'm going to do after the next 6 months because I want to quit this job & find something else. Only problem is I have no idea what I want to do. :( *sigh* haha For now I am going to try to get back into dieting. I started this morning but then I had a bad day & went out for Mexican for dinner. Dangit! haha So I'm going to retry again tomorrow & not let myself do this again.