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Getting Derailed

Sunday, October 07, 2012

Again, I am going through a quiet spell on Spark, although my life has been anything but quiet.

First there are the cats. I am now down to around ten. Three are adults that are mine (brothers from a feral’s litter), two are feral moms who are now fixed, two are from a 5 month old litter, and three are from a 14 week litter. The fixed moms kind of come and go as they wish, but the rest are housecats. The five kittens are all up for adoption, although the youngsters still need their shots and to be neutered. The young kittens have not been neutered because when they were about 5 weeks old, and a week before I was going to take them for their first shots, three of the four babies got infected with panlukepenia, which is similar to distemper in dogs. It’s a virus and there’s no treatment; they pretty much have to fight it on their own. The vet can put them on 24/7 IVs, but that runs about $300-$500 a day and can take as long as 10 days for them to recover, and even then there’s no guarantee they will make it. For someone who does not have a steady income, I just can’t afford that, and unfortunately I lost one kitten. One has since recovered and is thriving, one is still struggling to get better, and one never showed any symptoms. It’s been very tough and stressful watching the sick kittens. I feel so guilty because they would have been immunized for it one week later.

I started another contract job a few weeks ago in the Caribbean. I travel out on Monday and back on Friday. While the work is okay (I do project management, and this is not anywhere near that), my boss has been a constant problem for me. I won’t go into specifics, but suffice it to say that I got to a point where I simply could not take the harassment any longer and had to quit. I really wish I could find a nice, stable company with people who are more interested in working and solving problems than playing stupid power games. What a waste of time, energy, and money.

To make matters even more interesting, I have been experiencing some symptoms for the past few weeks that have me a bit worried. I went for some tests about a month ago which didn’t find anything that concerned the doctor, but the problem is not going away. I am meeting with the doctor later this week to talk about next steps. I may be looking at some major surgery, and am really not happy about that. I did get health insurance with this last job, so I’ll stay on COBRA, but if I need the surgery I won’t be able to do anything for several weeks, include making a living. I bought short and long term disability insurance with this job, so I am hoping that I will be able to collect from that if need be.

When I saw the doctor a few weeks ago, she told me that I could continue running, but between the 10-12 hour days and the travel, plus all the work I have to do around the house on Saturday and Sunday, I am completely wiped out. I think the situations involving the boss and my health are starting to make me depressed, and that’s not good either, especially since I have stopped running. I had a half marathon planned for late November with option #2 being Palm Beach in early December, but I’m thinking those plans are going to be scrapped. I may not be able to compete until sometime after the first of the year.

On a positive note, I decided to play Race Director and am organizing a one mile ocean swim race to benefit a local veteran’s group. It’s set for November 17 in Jupiter, Florida. If any locals are interested, they can find the event on Just do a search on Athletes for Athletes One Mile Ocean Swim Race to Benefit Veterans Adaptive Sports. Unfortunately my time out of the country working has made it near impossible to raise sponsorship funds, as well as properly market the race. I will definitely push the marketing once I am back in the U.S. in a couple of weeks. I have a number of friends who are really helping me distribute flyers around the county, and without them, I would have considered canceling the race. Regardless of how things turn out, I am using this as a learning experience for future races. I am on the board of directors of a large local charity called The Love Doctors Charities, and my long term goal is to organize an annual 5k run/walk for them. I am finding that I LOVE doing race directing; I just need to learn to do it better. I also have some ideas for races that I think will go over well in this area.

So, while I have a lot of stress in my life right now, I still have a lot of things to look forward to. Bad times don’t last forever; I just need to work through one thing at a time and know that better things are ahead. They always are.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    emoticon Thinking of you during this tough time for you.
    1963 days ago
    Hey Carolyn - sorry to hear that things got to the point you had to leave the job. Don't discount the toll that other people can take on your health. I spend all week exhausted because of the mental games going on at my office. It's really awful.

    I'm also sorry to hear about your health issues. Fingers crossed that it doesn't get to major surgery. Good thing you bought the extra insurance - very smart to plan ahead like that.

    Also, sorry to hear about the kitties. You know if it were up to me, I'd take about half of them off your hands! Just gotta get working on Larry to see the light!

    Hang in there! :D
    1963 days ago
    So good to hear from you my friend, but sad to hear about the rough patch with the kittens and the job and all. Hang in there - it WILL get better! I went through a quiet patch myself, but found my way back and am within my goal weight range again. Lucky I found a team for maintenance which I am loving and I try to stay somewhat active with them even if I don't have much time to do much else. Still trying to achieve the balance and find time for everything important to me in life - and to learn to say "NO" to what is not. So glad that the race directing bug has bitten you. It sounds like something that you really enjoy. So important to have those things in life to offset some of the "crud". Hoping and praying that your event is a success and that you find yourself back "on the road again" - running - soon!
    1964 days ago
  • JLITT62
    Your attitude is right on! A lot of stress here, too, bu there are always good things happening, too.
    1964 days ago
  • TIGGER622
    You are such an inspiration - all that you do and your positive attitude!!! I will be thinking and praying for you with your health issues. We are always here for you if you want to vent or cheer or cry or laugh... Hang in there!
    1964 days ago
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