I was told by someone today to get some control over my eating.
Funny-that's what i've been trying to do for about 30 years now.
I wonder if they would say the same thing to someone who had anorexia or even bulimia. Binge eating disorder is an eating disorder,just like the other two.
I would give anything not to be a binge eater.
If somebody came to me today and said if I gave them my right arm and I would never binge again-I would learn to write with my left arm. I really would.
But it ain't going to happen and I am dealing with it the best way I know how.
While thinking about this today-I felt really mad at this person.
I felt mad for all the women (and men) who suffer in silence because they try as hard as they can to"get some control" over their eating and can't.
Then they feel shame and guilt and their life is hell because people really believe that all they need to do is "get some control".
That's what my mom always believed too-"just don't eat"." Just go on a diet."
"why don't you just lose weight?"
Every time I binged, I though I was the worst person in the world.
I hated myself- because , no matter how I tried, I just could not get control of my eating. I could not get a grip.
For the last few years, I have been having much more control on my binging.
But not all the time-and I accept that.
When it happens, I dust myself off, get up, and continue on my journey.
This year, I have lost 45 lbs. That to me is a sure sign that I AM getting some control on my eating.
When women join the binge eating teams I am on and say they never admitted to another person how much they binge, I always feel so sad.
All of them talk about how they hate themselves and how they don't know why they binge and want to know how to stop.
Can you imagine me telling them to just "Lord-get some control!" ?
I hope that hateful person never has a person in their family with an eating disorder, because I would have to pity them.
To all the people who binge out there, not everybody thinks all you have to do is" get some control."
Some of us understand. Don't give up trying.
Have a nice day.