Saturday, October 06, 2012
Happy to report that progress continues!
I've hit 58lbs total lost so far and am looking forward to when I can say 60. I'm hoping I can say it by the end of October (and I think I'll be able to!) Weight loss has slowed down a little bit the last couple of weeks, but that's just the way it goes. It's still going in the right direction and I'm good with that! I know if l continue to push forward, then results will come.
We talk about all the physical changes as we lose weight, changes in our appearance, needing new clothes (yay!), increased energy levels, easier movement, and so on...but one change has been more apparent to me lately, and it's the one that always tends to get fluffed aside...an "oh, yeah, that too. Sure..." But it seems that not as much focus/energy/attention is given to it. It's the mental change that we go through during this journey.
I remember the weird feelings/reaction that I had several weeks ago when I realized I no longer fit into the plus sized clothes in the Lane Bryant catalog. Recently, I've noticed that I'm 'nicer' to myself in my thoughts. I'm not beating myself up anymore. If I can't get in a walk/jog one night - I'm not lazy, nor should I throw in the towel. I'll work harder to get it in the next night. I'll allow myself to indulge on Chinese food for my husband's birthday, see the scale stay up ALL WEEK LONG after the fact, and instead of freaking out about what I'm seeing on the scale, and instead of giving up or cursing my weakness, or wishing there would never be special occasions that ruin my progress - instead I focus on drinking water all week and eating healthy, truly knowing that the occasional indulgence wont break me. Just get back to one positive choice after another and it all comes out in the wash. It's no big deal! I'm learning to live with reality, to forgive myself, and moving on. It's almost liberating!
So many changes over this past year...both physical and mental. I'm happy with them all! It is a difficult journey. It's hard work and, in my opinion, boils down to a 90% mental game. But success breeds success. When you reach each goal, you want that great feeling to continue! Next week is the Flutie 5k. I'm excited and nervous. I'm looking forward to achieving this goal and trying to come up with another one to keep me on the straight and narrow. (o:
OH! And one more thought to share - NEVER did I think I'd like exercise (and I still don't 'like" it) But boy, oh, boy, now that we're back in school - Heading out for a walk/jog after an incredibly stressful day is something that I actually WANT to do!