60,000-79,999 SparkPoints 64,265

Very hard times

Saturday, October 06, 2012

I haven't updated in a long, I know :(
But I haven't done much in the last weeks except suffer and cry. The worst times of my year are right now.

So on my last blog I told you guys about my mouth surgery that went well and everything was fine. That was the day after. Two days after, so Friday, I felt awful all day. I was in pain, medication didn't seem to be working, I could barely eat anything and I kept crying. I never left my apartment, not even to take a walk, and I was mean to my boyfriend for no reason. Then Saturday it got a little better, but I still did nothing with my weekend because I was in too much pain to train. Gym was out of the question. And with my swollen face I barely dared going outside to see people. I felt fat and ugly.

Monday I started getting a weird taste in my mouth, like something really disgusting, but when I drank water it'd go away. I decided to go jogging in the evening even though I was still sore - but it was the best I ever was since the surgery so whatever! I jogged almost 4 kms and had to stop because I had a really bad cramp and was out of breathe (did I mention I also had a cold on top of that?). The pain wasn't too bad when running, but when I stopped, it became unbearable. Jogging was a mistake because the blood pumping to my face was trying to kill me. I paid for my mistake the rest of the evening.

I took the afternoon off the day after because I was way too sore, and the disgusting taste was constantly there, no matter what I drank or ate. I thought the surgery area was infected on the left side, because the taste came from there, it was more swollen than the right side and it didn't look good in the mirror. I went to the university clinic where I had my surgery but there's nobody on Tuesdays, so I had to take yet another apointment the day after. I'm so tired of losing so much money because I'm outta job and don't have any sick days left...

I went back the next day and they placed something in the hole that tasted like clove. Concentrated it's an awful taste but it's way better than the taste I had before... it wasn't infected but I had an alveolitis. I then had to go back to an hospital Friday morning at 10 to get it removed.

So my face and mouth got better and better and Friday morning I was confident it was my last time taking care of all this mess.

I went to the hospital for my 10 o'clock apointment and was told to wait until they'd call me. I waited ONE HOUR AND A HALF. What the?! Why do you take an apointment at 10 if you can't pass me at 10? After 80 minutes I asked the nurse and she said with a very condescending tone "well lady we're passing every clinic case before you so you need to wait." THEN WHY DO YOU TAKE AN APOINTMENT. DAMN.
After a lot of crying and panic and cringing I finally passed. It took TWO MINUTES to rinse my mouth and remove the thingy. 90 minutes of waiting for 2 minutes of dentistry.
But the best part yet is this: coming back to my car, I had a parking ticket waiting for me, because I parked in a 60 minutes place, naively thinking I'd be in and out quickly. 44 bucks out of my pockets, plus all the money I've lost from not working: one day and a half last week, one afternoon + one morning + 2 hours this week. My pay's gonna be ridiculous.

Yesterday night my mouth started hurting but I didn't touch anything, I just rinsed a lot with salted water. And guess what? This morning it's SWOLLEN AGAIN! It got WORSE ONCE AGAIN! I don't know what to do. I'm so tired of all this bullshiz, all the incompetence of the health care system, all the time I'm losing on this.

This week I only went to the gym once (Thursday morning) and to zumba Wednesday night. I jogged Monday, and that's it. Today I'll try to go to the gym but since it's swollen and painful I might not do a lot. This whole surgery feels like the worst thing that's ever happened to me. I feel depressed. And I can't do anything but wait until it gets better. But the part that frustrates me the very most is how far back I am on my training because of all this. I WANT to go to the gym, I want to jog, I want to move. But I'm in so much pain whenever I do that I can't last more than 5 minutes. Even if I try to go slowly. Even strenght training is hard because it makes my heart pump a little and then my mouth hurts. I feel like crying at the top of my lungs and throwing myself off a cliff.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    It sounds like someone may have done a botched job of your surgery. You may need to get another dentist to look at it and see. You may have a case to sue.
    1982 days ago
  • DS9KIE
    You just need to rest and not worry about exercising right now...your body is in need of rest so it can heal, when I had my wisdom teeth removed. they told me the more you rest the faster you will heal...I took almost a week off of work and then I had the weekend and by the time Monday came I almost felt normal and was able to go back to work.

    But if you have to work I can sure understand but I would do alot of resting after work.

    Hope you feel better soon. emoticon
    1982 days ago
    Wow, Joannie! Si les choses empirent, moi je dirais, c'est pas bon signe! Peut-être que tu as besoin de revoir (au moins appeler) dès maintenant? As-tu pensé à t'adresser à un service tel qu'info-santé, le service téléphonique? Peut-être qu'ils pourraient te référer à quelqu'un?

    Moi aussi, je pense qu'il est probablement préférable de mettre une partie de ton exercice en suspens, ton corps as besoin d'énergie supplémentaire pour guérir plus vite.

    Porte-toi bien, prompt rétablissement!
    1985 days ago
    Urgh, sounds like you're having a nightmare time. I hope you feel better soon and can get back to exercising the way you want to, but as above - strength and flexibility training sounds like a great way to shake things up until then.

    Good luck and well done for keeping up with things even though you've had a right old time of it. emoticon
    1988 days ago
    Ohh soo soryyy , U hang in there , u r doing amazing , working out while in pain , not losing it all , u will gfeel better in no time emoticon
    1988 days ago
    Hang in there I know how crippling it feels to be stopped by pain. Had that for almost a month. Take it easy on yourself! sending a lot of blood flow in your face may not be the right thing to do for now. I agree with babygirls concentrate on flexibility and strenght training that doesn't send blood rushing to your face. Better let your wounds heal properly before you do that. You'll heal faster and be back at it faster.

    Take care of yourself!

    1988 days ago
    Wow! So sorry to hear the problems you are facing. (on the financial front, though, I can certainly relate--it is depressing when things continue to go wrong). But, you have the desire to work out and stay in shape, you just find it difficult. So try stretching and some yoga, even if you don't usually do it. It will help with flexibility and keeping your muscles worked so you are ready when you do back to regular workouts, and if it hurts, just do it for a few minutes at a time, as many times as you can work into your day without overdoing. And be mindful of what you eat, to help your body heal faster. I can only imagine what you are facing, but take heart, your spark friends are pulling for you every step of the way! emoticon emoticon
    1989 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.