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Be Careful What You Dream

Friday, October 05, 2012

Yesterday I read Cock-Robin's blog Dreams and Nightmares. I told him I would write a blog inspired by that and share my long-time dream. I don't want to because I see now what a pathetic, selfish, sad thing it really was.
Okay then, I said often and for years that my dream was to own a library where I could read all the time and have food delivered to me every day so I could eat all I wanted, no matter how fat I got, because I would never go out and no one would come in.
Is that not the sickest, most selfish thing you ever heard?! But as I look around, I realize I could almost describe my life like that right now. Between Amazon and the public library, I have every-thing I want to read. And until sometime in May, I went to Walmart and various restaurants and fast food places many of which are within a 2 block radius of my house, any time I wanted. I live alone in a senior apartment building. So I could just sit and veg all the time. And I did.
I was living the dream. (NIGHTMARE!)
I hit my highest weight ever, and my health was starting to head south. I was diagnosed with diabetes, my knees were beginning to give out on me, and except for my family, I had gotten pretty reclusive. Oh, yes. I had the dream.
But in May things started to change. For months I had been completely unable to get a hold on my eating. I was just stuffing it in with both hands and no end in sight, except an unhealthy one. But now I began to eat healthier and slowly lost 5 lbs. And though my knees were hurting, I began to walk around my building.
And at the end of May, my daughter, IMSOOZEEQ introduced me to SparkPeople. I signed up, but then ignored it for a week. But something drew me back. And since that time I have cleaned up my eating, begun to exercise more, joined a gym, and lost almost another 40 lbs. emoticon
But even more than that, I am spending more time with friends, not just here in the building, but going out to lunch, and shopping. I am going to church regularly and am reaching out in ministry to others. I may soon resume teaching a Bible Study. I'm visiting Spark every day and getting involved with Sparkfriends.
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Thank you SparkPeople and all my Teams. You may have saved my life, you've certainly made it more fulfilling.
So what is my point? Be careful what you dream and what you say. You may get it. emoticon
God bless you all! Keep Sparking.

Here's the song that Cock-Robin put on his blog. I love it and hope you enjoy it. -KFAa40kZ30

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
BEESPARKLE 2/21/2013 10:55AM

    Great Blog and a new you in thinking! emoticon

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EJOY-EVELYN 10/25/2012 4:42PM

    Wow! I am so impressed by how far you have come and so quickly. What an incredible role model you have become! Keep up the great work. You've inspired my path with your story. Am a freggie lover and am enjoying a couple very clean days where freggies have, indeed, been the main attraction in my life. Have a great week and keep up the great work! Hug, hug -- Evelyn

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FLYINGPIGS165 10/18/2012 11:58AM

    This was a super blog entry! I am so thankful that you are here to get healthy and inspire us all. I am certainly inspired by you and your encouragement is priceless emoticon

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SAINTBETH 10/15/2012 11:01AM

    I can identify with your dream library. But isn't it great to feel good about getting out now? Your journey and mine are very similar. We can do this!

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NOWELLE76 10/8/2012 2:04AM

    That was a great blog... I guess I have dreams like that sometimes.. like eating all the ice cream and eating it everyday kind of stuff. I guess that's one that somewhat came true for me and probably pushed me the last 10 pounds from 335 to 345 :( hehe... I love ice cream. Anyways... I've lost 56 pounds but still love ice cream.

So glad to hear that you were inspired to become more social again because I think being social is a must when trying to lose weight. I certainly can't do it alone either and the more balance including social outings that I get, the better that I feel.

RYN: you posted a comment on my blog a few weeks back stating "welcome to twoterville"... wait, I think I just got that.. welcome to the 200s? Thanks :)

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PROJECT_SUSAN 10/7/2012 7:27PM

    Mom, I am so glad you are here and that you are living life outside! emoticon And although I have a very long journey to take, I am so glad that I am here. I am starting to see that I can do it and that I will get to my goal! Thanks for traveling with me!

Love you!


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HOLLYM48 10/7/2012 9:37AM

    Thanks for sharing your dream/nightmare! It is so true that you have to be careful what you wish for but it sounds like you are on the right path now. Congrats on your weight loss and good luck in the future with your sparking and getting back into life! emoticon

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JAOTAO 10/7/2012 9:32AM

    Thank you for your heartfelt story. It rings very true. Yes, we can create our own worst realities just by dreaming. Blessing to you on your road to wholeness. emoticon emoticon

Jackie O

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PATTYCAKE17 10/7/2012 8:53AM

    sometimes our dreams do not turn out so perfectly in real life which is why so many of them remain just visions. As we live and learn and grow, we outgrow our old ideas and get better ones. can't wait to hear your new dreams.. I think they will be much more active and fun, in keeping with the new person you've become. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JILL313 10/6/2012 12:24AM

    Glad that awful dream you had and lived are long past you. . .You sound so much healthier, both mentally and physically, since you've been on Spark!! I am so happy for you as you are an inspiration to me and many others. You're now enjoying Life and that has to be thrilling. You actually look good to me judging by your picture. Continue onward dear friend. I'm so glad your new and wonderful dream has become you're reality now!!

Hugs & Love,


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IOWAGRAMMA 10/5/2012 8:14PM

    Oh, told your story straight from your heart! What a wonderful testimony to your progress and I thank you so much for sharing it with all of us! Best to you, and let's keep moving forward and reach our goals of a wonderfully healthy life! Love, Jeannie
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KADYSMOM11 10/5/2012 7:03PM

    I am so proud of you!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BELDONDOG1 10/5/2012 6:24PM

    Your dream of your lifetime reminded me of an old "Twilight Zone" starring Burgess Meredith. He wanted nothing more than to read and be left alone. The world ended and he was the only person alive and of all things, stuck at the library with all these books around him. He was in heave!. He started looking for his glasses and found them---except the lens were all broken. Watch what you dream for and what you wish for. I enjoyed your blog and thanks for helping me remembering this old TV show. (hugs) Noel

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MASTERPIECE8 10/5/2012 12:22PM

    Janet, this is a wonderful blog. You are an inspiration. I'm so happy for you AND guess what. I absolutely love to read too. I'm great friends with Amazon.

Best wishes for your continued success.


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IMAVISION 10/5/2012 11:27AM

    What a wonderful account of success.

God bless!

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MTNGRL 10/5/2012 11:00AM

    What a great blog!!!!!!!!!!!!

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KIMPY225 10/5/2012 9:44AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

I am glad you are here! Sometimes dreams vs reality really show us what life is all about! I am glad you are making healthier choices!

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ROXYZMOM 10/5/2012 8:35AM

    Congratulations on looking back and realizing what you were doing, and having the courage to envision a new dream and move forward! You have come so far on so many levels! Your a great inspiration!
Thank you for sharing!

Comment edited on: 10/5/2012 8:36:37 AM

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YOBETHIE 10/5/2012 7:31AM

    So true! I am so glad you have found a new dream!

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LADYBUG546 10/5/2012 12:38AM

    emoticon this is very true

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Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.