Thursday, October 04, 2012
This morning, I went to Kaiser for what turned out to be 5 appointments. I have never before been able to schedule everything on the same day, let alone all on the morning. First was the fasting blood test. I have terrible veins that collapse easily, so I’ve experienced lots of “fishing expeditions”. No problems this morning. I knew I would be hungry afterwards, so I brought a granola bar and a banana. I sat outside in the garden area and enjoyed both along with the beautiful weather.
Next up, I thought, would be the flu shot. But that clinic would not be open for another hour. I took a walk for most of that time. So proud of myself for that! When I got back, it was a short wait (I thought I should have walked longer and was also amazed that my lower back did not object.) and I was finished with that in seconds.
Then was the physical with my new doctor. The appointment was in the same building, but more than an hour later. I registered anyway and was called in almost immediately. For me, the purpose was to get her signature on a paper from my company attesting to the fact that I’d had a physical. I had no complaints and the company has offered a $50 incentive to be paid in December for taking care of ourselves this way. My numbers (BP etc) are excellent. I know she was surprised to see that because my weight is so high. I need to lose 74 pounds!
Then was the booster vaccine (same building, but another clinic, so another registration and another wait). They tell me I will be very sore tomorrow (I am already!) Both shoulders (they did not want to do both on the same shoulder.)
The squish test was in a different building so I got some more steps in. I was very, very early for that appointment and it looked, at first, as if I were going to have to wait until that time came. When they called me back up and asked if I were aware of the time, I said I was, but I hoped to get in early so I could get to work. One person was training another and I heard them discuss the fact that they had only one machine. My heart sank. But they took me early! The technician complimented me for allowing her to manipulate me as she needed for the scans. She said most women flinch at being touched. Well, I don’t enjoy this test, but I’d rather the technician got a good picture the first time and that she sees all the tissue. I was surprised to learn I now have to have this annually...(age)
While I was walking around the complex, I saw an elderly man walking. He was hunched over at the waist, his trunk completely parallel to the ground. He walked with a cane and one foot thumped loudly with each step (I walk that way also, but not as pronounced.). I could not see any reason for the heavy footfall, but I was stunned at his posture. I think he would have stood about 6 feet were he able to stand tall. Very sad. I surmised as I watched him that he is probably a veteran and it’s a shame that he cannot stand tall at this point in his life. Seeing him and some of the other patients reinforced my determination to take care of myself.
On the other hand, after watching last night’s debate, reviewing my financial situation and receiving bad news in the mail, I am completely discouraged about my future. In the next few days, I will be reviewing my options, such as they are. Bankruptcy is abhorrent to me, but it is an option. Look for a better paying job or a second job, talk to my creditors (scary!) and other thoughts. Not wanting to face the facts is not productive – an interesting parallel to my SP journey, but not one I will delve into here today. But this issue does impact the rest of my life. It’s hard to work, hard to feel positive…We’ve all struggled like this. I am not the only one.
I took most of the day off, but I did go in to work so that I could join in the celebration for an employee who is retiring tomorrow. He is so excited! I am sorry to see him leave. He is someone I like and respect and enjoy. They had a huge yummy looking chocolate cake. I walked away as it was being cut. I knew better than to get near it. At this point, I cannot make exceptions for “special” events. I won’t drop this tonnage.