Tuesday, October 02, 2012
So I have a confession to make. I didn't want to make a grand announcement in case I failed as I so often do. I still may fail but I have a great start and I think this time will be different.
Last Sunday, I smoked my last cigarette. As of right now I have been smoke free for 8 days, 10 hours and 45 mins. The longest I have ever gone without 1 puff from a cigarette. All other quits that I have attempted and failed, I would have had a cheating puff by now. This time has been so much easier except for the few times I seriously could have eaten a cigarette. I have had cravings and when I do feel tempted to give in, it just seems like too much trouble to have to start over again. By the time I have this internal debate, the craving has passed. I have used an e-cig and nicotine gum. I have probably used 5 pieces of gum over the past week and I am down to after meals and really bad craves for the e-cig. I don't want it to become a crutch. I know a guy who quit smoking 6 years ago using the nicotine lozenges and still eats those things daily. Yeah I don't want to be that person.
I only told a few people close to me that I was going to quit: my husband, my sparkbud Jen and of course co-workers who would figure it out anyway when I don't resemble a smoke stack, smell like an ashtray or run out every 30 mins to smoke. I love not smelling of smoke and I have had to wash tons of stuff to get the stale smoke smell out, but things are smelling a lot fresher around here. The first few days I had some made crazy munchies going on but those have, for the most part tapered off. I did gain 1 lb last week, but that could be due to a number of things so I am not sweating it.
I regret ever taking that first puff. I have smoked for over 20 years and have done countless damage to my body. My smoker's cough is getting better and is pretty much a morning thing now. I have fine lines around my mouth. I have even read that smoking can cause premature graying of the hair, yep have that too and I have a date with some Ms Clairol after while. My allergies have worsened over the years. Walking up stairs my heart would race and I couldn't catch my breath, can you imagine how hard hiking steep trails has been for me? All those things are getting better, except to the gray hair and wrinkles, but I have some products for those lol.
While some people feel that the e-cig is just trading one evil for another, I agree on a small part, but I feel it is the lesser of the 2 evils. And I know for a fact, I puff on it much less than I did my 2 packs a day (sometimes 3 if I was bored at work) cigarette habit. Some people are able to go cold turkey, I am not that person. I have tried. I have tried every method of quitting except being hypnotized. Patches, gum, pills (Chantix and Zyban) I have tried them all over the years. This is the longest I have been smoke free without cheating. I did quit last Christmas for a month, but I fell off the wagon less than a week in for a day, got back on, and was horrible pissy ill for a month, got mad lost my temper and bought a pack. This time I made a conscious decision that I was in control of my emotions and the way that I behaved. I still ended up taking my husband's head off a few times, then I took a vow of silence at home but other than that I have been pretty upbeat with it all. Hubby decided that he would quit his dipping tobacco too, so things were really interesting around here last week. The phrase of the week "Just walk away, just walk away".
Other than having the creeping crud which I think I caught from coworkers because everyone is snotting and coughing at work and it has been cold and rainy for days here, I am feeling great. Hopefully I can get over this crud faster because I quit smoking and it wont' linger from now until Christmas. Well time for some more NyQuil and a nap!