Monday, October 01, 2012
Last week was soooooo soo soo so stressful! It was work. We started using this new computer system and it's such a nightmare learning everything and going thru getting patient's registered and this and that, doing so much more than we were used to. I didn't do ANY walking at all during the week, I ate really badly, even getting fast food when I didn't even want to eat it. It tasted like cardboard, but I still ate it! Like three or four times last week. UGH! I didn't exericse. I stayed at home being lazy and eating like three bowls of cereal in one sitting. NOT A GOOD WEEK. I'm sure I gained like crazy!
But, today is October 1st. A new month and a new chance. I have a little less than 3 months before I go to Africa and I am determined again. I want to lose weight and feel good before I go so I can feel my best and have a great time when I'm there. I don't want to be thinking about what all my husband's friends and family are thinking about me, I want that out of my mind. I know, I'm not going to lose 100 lbs. before then, but just a little loss will help my mindset and how I feel about myself and even a little how I look and fit into my clothes.
I went shopping with my husband yesterday at the mall and we were looking for all these clothes and shoes for him and it was fun. But, I couldn't look at any. Well, I mean they did have my plus size stores I shop at, but I wanted to be able to look in the same stores he did. Like Express or even Macys. I just want to fit in with him. I saw myself in the mirror and thought, wow... compared to him, I'm about three times bigger. Not a good feeling and not something a wife wants to be thinking about herself. I need to change. For real and for good this time. I'm sick of these thoughts. I know they won't automatically go away when I start losing weight, I've got to make them go away by thinking better of myself. I deserve happiness and I deserve to feel good about myself at all times.
When I lost weight a few years ago, a lot of things changed. I was able to fit better into clothes, I was happier, I started dressing up and looking at clothes I wouldn't have looked at before. I want that again. And I know I can do it.
Today is October 1st, a new start. I already hit the gym this morning and I plan on walking a lot today like I usually do. I will not let work stress get in the way of my plans this week at all. Here's to a good day, good week and great month and an amazing vacation. I'm looking forward to it all now. I've got a new attitude!