Today we took our daughter to the Central WA fair. In spite of a couple rough moments, we had a blast. I am continually amazed at my increased participation in life with my more mobile body.
This is what some people in my life don't understand... I am not losing weight to be a super model. I have abused my body my entire life. You don't lose 170# and expect your skin to bounce back, or not have sag and wag. I am losing weight to be active, have choices, and live the life I WANT rather than settling for watching it from the side lines. When I was 420#, there is no way that I would have been able to walk the fairgrounds for 6 hours, let alone go on a kiddie-rollercoaster! But today I did. My 4 yr old desperately wanted to ride the rollercoaster but was afraid to go alone. I worried I wouldn't fit, but I did. And the lap bar lowered and locked with no problem. The train stayed on the track, and I was able to provide my daughter with a wonderful time.
All day, she talked about the Ferris Wheel. Now... I'm really uncomfortable with heights. Like REALLY don't enjoy them. At all. But I love my baby girl (yes, I know she's spoiled, but she's a great kid in spite of it). I read the height restrictions signs, and looked for a weight limit, and didn't find one. So, I stood in line with her, handed the man our tickets, and waited for a dirty look or for him to tell me that I was too large for the ride. I held my breath.
"Please don't embarrass me in front of my daughter and all these people", I thought.
The man simply smiled and handed me the seat belt to latch. It was loose. He helped me tighten it, and locked in the safety rail. Up we went. I felt "normal". My daughter was on cloud nine.
My cup overflows tonight... my heart is bursting with happiness after a full, exhausting, fun day with my family. We are so blessed to have this miracle child. And I am so thankful that I committed to this journey 9 months ago, and recommit daily, to live a happier, healthier life. I hope she looks back on her childhood with love and laughter, rather than with thoughts of "I wish my mom had been able to do that with me".
And just because I adore her.......