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thanks you and ...what ifīs

Saturday, September 29, 2012

i first want to thank you all for the great response to my last blogs and reading your response made me start thinking of what ifs which is never a good idea.my nana used to always say.we never regret the things we do only the things we donīt do as we get older.i wouldnīt say she was a 100% right there but it certainly has a lot of truth in it.when i was younger i wanted to be a dress designer and got a place in landridnod collage of art studying art and textile design,i loved it but was only there for 1 1/2 terms as my nana and my sister was involved in a terrible car crash and i gave up my college to help look after them.i never regreted my decision really as my nana was always my world and i would have(still would if she was alive)and did do anything and everything to make her life easier for her.but to help make my desicion easier for me i talked myself in to believing i wasnīt that good anyway and would probably have been kicked out further down the line at some point.even after my nana died and my sister got better i had so convinced myself i was no good so i didnīt even try to renew my course and my life took another direction.i started looking after children and funnily enough or not funnily enough i taught needle work and art and crafts first in a deaf school then i moved on the be a childrens developement and coordinater.big title to mean i did play sessions,craft etc with kids .went to kino and skateing etc with them then going on to nannying went i felt a need to change and see abit of the world.i worked in london,spain,italy,greece and ended up here in germany.i have seen many places and met lots of people and very rarely did i regret giving up my art and texile design.reading all you comments on how talented you think i am made me relise that maybe i could have gone back to the course all those years ago that i talked myself into believing i was no good at drawing either.deep down inside i also know that is partly true.but doing the kids room,seeing the joy on their faces made me realise how musch i miss not using my creative side.i know it is alot harder now with my vision as i have to stop after an hour or so of close or concentrated work which is why the kis room took 4 days instead of the 4-6 hours it would have took me before my facial paralise but the kids faces,your response to my blog and the sense of achievment i got as a result made me realise i should try to do more than i do do.just because it takes longer or makes me tired very quickly is no reason not to do it.so i will be getting out my knitting needles or my embroidery or my sewing machine or even buy an artist block to start drawing again.the problems i had when making ayyubs schule tute made me think i couldnīt do close work again.but doing the painting of the kids room etc made me realise where there is a will there is away.so to all of you out there who has a few what ifīs lieing dormant or even in the forfront of your mind maybe it is time to brush off the cobwebs of them and see if you can turn the what ifīs into wow i can do this if i put my mind to it.WHAT ARE YOUR WHAT IF`S AND WHAT CAN YOU DO TO MAKE THEM YOUR WOW`S NOW:
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