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When I get tired


Saturday, September 29, 2012

At night I have been feeling anxiety and a little panicky. The article I saw on the site front page came just in time. It talked about comfort exercises which are a new concept for me. At night, I really have to either move or sleep or both.

These past few weeks I have just been feeling like there is so much wrong with me and I don't know what my fall back position is supposed to be. Fall back position. For me, I think that means what to do when I am thinking, I am not studying hard enough, I am not eating good enough. I don't clean enough, I don't exercise enough. Nothing is enough, nothing is good enough. Okay, what now? Where do I start? What is my fall back position? I sit there and think I can exercise but I need to clean or I need to prepare tomorrow's healthy meal but I have to study or call Mom or get that flu shot.

Yes, I tend to feel this happen at night and I do need to get things done but which things cause I can't do it all in the morning before I go to work. And really. ....I just need a freaking break. I know this so that is another should. I should relax, take time for myself and recharge but where is that supposed to happen?

So what is the goal, the defining thought that puts it all into perspective and prioritizes it all?

Right now, for me it is just to sleep. This stress is still there in the mornings, I just tend to fool myself into thinking I can get it all done. So good night. Sleep tight and thanks to this blog for letting me vent. That has been very helpful.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
DIANE7786 9/29/2012 7:12AM

    You're probably tired because you're overwhelmed. Taking a break won't help because you'll return to the same unresolved issues. A long term comfort exercise can be finding ways of making the best use of your time. What worked for me was making a time sheet with one line for each 1/2 hr of the day and then making several copies. At the beginning of each week I marked off time already taken for sleeping, working (including dressing, breakfast and commute), 30 mins for exercise, 30 mins for dinner, and an hour to relax before bed. There were 3 hours left in my day for tasks. I made a detailed “to do” list. Occasional entertainment is a “to do!” Large tasks were broken into segments that take about 30 mins. I used the “to do” list to fill the 3 hours on my time sheet. Saturday I marked time for batch cooking (4 hours), large task from “to do” list (3 hours). Sunday was blank. Later I wrote what I did in different ink. Anything not on the time sheet didn’t have to be done that week--no stress! It was nice knowing what I would do each night after dinner--no thinking! When I got home from work I lit fragranced candles and listened to music to make tasks seem somewhat relaxing. Ideally I followed my daily plan. When I didn’t I wrote what I actually did in different ink. At the end of the week it was mentally satisfying to see my accomplishments. I also could see wasted time so I could find ways to improve. Over time the “to do” list became shorter as long neglected tasks were completed. At some point I had a routine and didn’t need daily time sheets. I still use a “to do” list.

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STEPHINE723 9/29/2012 2:38AM

    Remember to sit back, relax, and breathe. Life is always going to keep going no matter what. Maybe try to do some very easy but relaxing yoga in before bed? This will give you some time to just be. Those racing thoughts can really get to you (trust me, I know) but only you decide what happens from there. Sometimes if I have too many thoughts I close my eyes and count. From 1 to 100 and then from 100 to 1. If by then I'm still not tired I keep doing it. I know it seems silly but it works!

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WORTHART 9/29/2012 1:39AM

    You have a lot on your plate but you seem to be piling too many shoulds on there. It sounds like no matter how much you do you feel you have not accomplished enough. Sometimes at the end of the day I write a list of all the things I've done that day and it really gives me a lift to see everything I've done and it helps me realize that I getting way more done than I give myself credit for.

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LATTELEE 9/29/2012 12:54AM

  Interesting

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