Saturday, September 29, 2012
At night I have been feeling anxiety and a little panicky. The article I saw on the site front page came just in time. It talked about comfort exercises which are a new concept for me. At night, I really have to either move or sleep or both.
These past few weeks I have just been feeling like there is so much wrong with me and I don't know what my fall back position is supposed to be. Fall back position. For me, I think that means what to do when I am thinking, I am not studying hard enough, I am not eating good enough. I don't clean enough, I don't exercise enough. Nothing is enough, nothing is good enough. Okay, what now? Where do I start? What is my fall back position? I sit there and think I can exercise but I need to clean or I need to prepare tomorrow's healthy meal but I have to study or call Mom or get that flu shot.
Yes, I tend to feel this happen at night and I do need to get things done but which things cause I can't do it all in the morning before I go to work. And really. ....I just need a freaking break. I know this so that is another should. I should relax, take time for myself and recharge but where is that supposed to happen?
So what is the goal, the defining thought that puts it all into perspective and prioritizes it all?
Right now, for me it is just to sleep. This stress is still there in the mornings, I just tend to fool myself into thinking I can get it all done. So good night. Sleep tight and thanks to this blog for letting me vent. That has been very helpful.