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    MANDELOVICH   62,023
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
Keeping myself accountable

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Many of us on Spark People know the value of keeping ourselves accountable. We come here to track our food, fitness and many other goals. It's such a wonderful tool.

Well, as I've released weight and am almost at goal, I've decided to focus on improving the quality of my life overall, particularly in terms of my relationships with others. And I find that all of the tools I've used to become physically healthier are wonderful for becoming more emotionally healthy and joyful as well.

Yesterday I created a log where I'm tracking my slip ups. Not because I want to make myself feel badly about them, but because I want to keep myself accountable, learn from them, redo them, and change some habits of mind.

It's been quite revolutionary to do this. Firstly, much in the way it kept me honest when I was binging and had to write down 3000 calorie slip ups, keeping track of moments when I'm unskillful towards my loved ones is keeping me honest. I was shocked at how many things I had to write down yesterday, before noon! But at the same time, I felt softer after I did it, especially since the last column in my chart is about a redo.

For those interested, I'm tracking the following:

What happened, what did I do? (snap at my husband)
What was the cause? (I felt rushed and tired)
How did I feel right after I did it? (guilty, embarassed)
How did the other person feel? (angry, hurt, disappointed in me)
Redo (I speak with a respectful, loving tone and ask for what I need. He responds in kind).

Anyway, tracking is good for so many things!
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NELLJONES 9/27/2012 12:41PM

    In 12 step programs it's called taking an inventory and is essential to recovery.

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-VIXEN- 9/27/2012 12:02PM

    I love this idea! I do a reflection exercise each night before bed. I ask myself what I did wrong or could have done better, what I can do to make an amends to anyone I have hurt and I also ask myself what I did right that day, if I brightened anyone's life or made them smile. I go to sleep with a clean slate, so to speak. Being honest with ourselves is so important. All the best to you. :)

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LAURAANN54 9/27/2012 11:57AM

    That sounds like a good plan I got upset yesterday also at my husband it is not his fault he has a very bad back and gets grumpy mostly at me. I can be ok with it most of the time because I know he hurts but I just didn't yesterday. I felt bad after I brought it to his attention what he was doing but he was better after that. Thank you for your post

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