Day 31: Old Sh*t
Friday, September 21, 2012
At the risk of totally alienating everyone with yet another "TMI" post, I am going to share a little more about my experience with the colonics so far. As part of my detox from chemo and other cancer treatments I have endured over the past six years, I am seeing my colon hydrotherapist weekly (two, back-to-back sessions for the first two weeks, then just once a week). First of all, let me just say that I never thought I would use a possessive pronoun with the words, "colon hydrotherapist" (or really the words "colon hydrotherapist" at all). While I have already talked a bit about the physical experience of this process so far, today I want to touch on something else I have noticed - the emotional changes it has triggered in me.
The process of having a colonic is pretty intense and intimate. Everyone experiences them differently, but I get chills and hot flashes, some nausea and sometimes what feels like a panic attack coming on. Throughout the session (mine last about an hour each), you can literally watch your body rid itself of old sh*t that has been stuck in your large intestines for way too long. In order for this process to be successful, you have to really be willing to let go. Interestingly, I have noticed a correlation between the required physical release and an emotional release the process seems to have inspired. Things I have been stuffing down for years (e.g. needs I have in my relationship that aren't being met) are coming out and I am forced to examine them in the daylight.
Maybe the timing of this is purely coincidental, but my colon hydrotherapist (who was a counselor in her previous professional life) says that these shifts often happen in conjunction with colonics. She said that people who choose to go through this process are generally ready for something to change in their lives. After all, colonics are not usually people's first line of defense when it comes to self care. It's often the LAST thing that people try because they are grasping for something - anything - that could provide some relief. I just think it's fascinating. Let's get that old (emotional and actual) sh*t out, and keep it out! So far it's very uncomfortable in lots of ways, but I'm learning a lot in the process.