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    SHERYLDS   54,086
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Push That Tush -- the Power Of Words

Friday, September 21, 2012

So much of what I deal with today, started with words.

Let’s forget about body image for a second…I’m talking real world right now.
I have a weight problem; I wear my flaw on the outside. There is no real way to camouflage that weakness. Sometimes, I’m good at dressing to look slimmer…but I can’t hide it from myself. I see myself naked in the mirror (I know …you didn’t need that mental image, but live with it…this is my blog). To thine own self be true.

There are all kinds of people in the world…some are dumber than others.
And of the less intelligent population of the species comes:
The CLUELESS who don’t know the right way to say something …but mean well
The HYENAS who do know what they are saying … and like to be funny at your expense
The VULTURES who know what they are saying…and enjoy feeding off of your pain
The SNAKES who know how to imply something without directly saying it…and intentionally hurt people because that’s who they are.

I’ve had them all in my life…I’m guessing these are also familiar to you.
I can talk to the CLUELESS and try reasoning with them. And sometimes it does work…Sometimes. But human nature being what it is…flawed…I may have to deal with this over and over. So I choose not to get myself all worked up, and pay the price…I brush it off and realize, I’m dealing with a benign idiot.

Sometimes I try communicating with the HYENAS…but more often than not, these parasites feign the guise of ‘only kidding’, so it’s not worth the effort. I mention that it’s not funny to me, and I don’t appreciate it…but insensitive people hear only what they want to hear…and …the rest is history.

I try to steer clear of VULTURES. I find these sadistic people are spiritually corrupt...and I have no use for them. They are the bullies of this world. They have internal issues they can’t deal with so they take it out on what THEY consider easy prey. I can’t deal with their crap. I keep my distance…because I am a pressure cooker…I simmer quietly until I explode. But when I simmer…I try to ‘anesthetize’ my anger with…you guessed it … eating. I don’t trade potshots with them…I don’t bother keeping company with them.

The MASTER of this jungle is the SNAKE. These are the worst of the villians because they attack and leave you bleeding and you don’t even realize you’ve been cut. They use subtle put downs quietly aimed at keeping you still while they fill you with negative toxic words that echo in your head long after they leave the scene. What you are left with, is a self loathing that has no place being there. These people can’t stand THEMSELVES…so they want to infect others with their own venom. They feed on your pain. It took me a lifetime to recognize this type of person. You can find their fingerprint on your psyche, by how you feel after they leave. And if you find yourself feeling worthless, demeaned, depressed, and hating yourself after being with someone…and YOU didn’t do anything…chances are you’ve been poisoned. I want nothing to do with these people.

And no matter how smart you are…you sometimes find yourself doing the same to others. I do not want to become one of these people. I try hard to recognize that behavior and stop myself immediately.

So where am I going with this?

Words have the power to hurt…or heal.
If you keep echoing the negative thoughts in your head, they will keep bouncing around in there until they destroy your dreams.
You have to STOP that.
Silence the put downs and lies…and fill that space with hopes and dreams and the knowledge that YOU are worthy and strong and You CAN do this.

emoticon PUSH THAT TUSH -- because you're worth it emoticon

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
LOSTLIME 9/26/2012 9:29AM

    So very true! Words can be very hurtful. emoticon emoticon

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GABIBEAR 9/22/2012 2:14AM

    It is good to see in writing , things that we know yet sometimes can't put our finger on. For instance, The Snake. There have been many times that I have received one of those stings and like you said before I could realize what just happened, they are gone but the sting of there words stay with me for a long time and I find myself angry that I didn't respond by letting them know what a snake I think they are!

That is why I love SparkPeople. Everyone here is so supportive and encouraging. They are either going through or have gone through what we are experiencing and are so helpful. I really like it here! emoticon emoticon emoticon

I think you are a wonderful person and am glad that you stay clear of these people - frenamies. They claim to be friends but are undercover enemies!

emoticon emoticon

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MALEXANDER4 9/22/2012 2:04AM

    OH yeah I know some just like that. I'm still walking around wondering what i'm doing wrong in life. They seem to have it all worked out and i'm still working on it. But i'm true to myself. I don't hurt others to make me feel better, and I will walk beside you not in front of or behind you. So lets PUSH THAT TUSH and make this year end with those SNAKES flat under our tires. Eat my dust 2012 new body coming in 2013

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TERRI289 9/21/2012 11:03PM

    Incredible put a name to things that I have been thinking about for awhile. It is getting easier to avoid them as long as they are not family emoticon

You and me-staying the course!! PUSH THAT TUSH(and the HATERS to the curb!!!)


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DEBBIEDAY 9/21/2012 10:56PM

    emoticon Great post, yes...we can all relate!!!

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TIRED49 9/21/2012 10:42PM

    This was a wonderful blog, and so true. I liked what you said about not being like them, we need to be better.

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TEXASFILLY 9/21/2012 9:59PM

    Great blog, Sher! *hugs* I'd say that you pretty much summed up the scumbags that pass for human beings. Thanks for sharing your wonderful insight. *hugs* BB~ emoticon

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PATRICIAANN46 9/21/2012 9:38PM

  Hi Sheryl.........
I am sure that most or all of us could put the face of someone we know with each of your descriptions. As usual, you are "Right On" regarding what each of these people can do to us if we allow it. NOT ALLOWING IT is not easy and something that we have to work on our entire lives. I am doing real well with the CLUELESS, the HYENAS, and the VULTURES, but the SNAKES are so insidious that I am not sure I will ever conquer them..........But I will certainly give it my best.
Have a Great weekend!!!

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CHINAGAL 9/21/2012 7:39PM

    Well said!

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DONNA5281 9/21/2012 7:31PM


You've said it all! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LTURSS 9/21/2012 6:32PM

    So true! There are so many kinds of people out there...unfortunately, most of them aren't very nice.
Thanks for helping us sort out the ones we want to be around!

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CHACHAOREO 9/21/2012 4:48PM


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WALLAHALLA 9/21/2012 3:10PM

    Quite timely, as I had a major attack by words this week. Not always easy to keep the shield in place.

Who was the idoit who coined the rhyme "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me"? Give me the sticks and stones any day. Those bruises heal a lot faster!

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SOSIREGIME 9/21/2012 2:52PM

    I love the animal examples. You're so right about the power of words to harm. I find that careless comments really stick with me. Sometimes friends or family just casually remark on the size of my body parts - it just makes me want to scream. And then it hangs around in my head and becomes this kind of evil chant. Must resist these words and do as you say - fill the space with positives. Thank you for this post.

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    Have faith in your self and everything else will fall into place. No one else really matters. You know the truth.

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JERSEYDEBBIE23 9/21/2012 2:08PM


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POLSKARENIA 9/21/2012 1:37PM

    Great choice of animals, and oh, so true!!

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SAINTBETH 9/21/2012 12:57PM

    I love your categories! So true.

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STRINGI719 9/21/2012 12:28PM


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LINDAK25 9/21/2012 11:53AM

    This is so true! We've all had people in our lives like these. For some of us, their voices continue to exist in our minds and we need to turn them off and stop listening to the echoes. We are so hard on ourselves, aren't we?

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LAINYC 9/21/2012 11:41AM


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BESTMEICANBE51 9/21/2012 11:36AM

    You brought me to tears. You just named all the "creatures" that I've put up with all my life. Some of whom left permanent scars.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Another emoticon blog !

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ESILBO 9/21/2012 11:30AM

    AWESOME, emoticon emoticon emoticon LISE

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GOLDENRODGIRL 9/21/2012 10:48AM


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SPARKSUE1985 9/21/2012 10:33AM

    Love it! What we're all trying to do is hard enough without people like that.

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WOUBBIE 9/21/2012 10:29AM

    SNAKE: Cousin named Lorraine.

If any single person keeps me out of heaven because of the hatred I keep in my heart it will be that asp-hole.

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DNRAE1 9/21/2012 10:28AM

    That was beautifully and powerfully said and extremely appreciated. Thank you for reminding me where to put the "word snakes".....out of my mind! I've found that losing weight is a slow, painful process and it would be so easy to be negative about it, but how wonderful it is to look at where I am compared to where I was! I continue to look forward and not back!!!

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SNOWYOGA 9/21/2012 10:20AM

    Wow! emoticon

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HELEN_BR 9/21/2012 10:19AM

    Oh, how true Sheryl! I had a few snakes in my life. Weren't they called passive aggressives???? LOL


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AUNTB63 9/21/2012 10:11AM

    Well put together blog....we can all relate to at least one of these types of people it not all of them. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and let's try to stay away from these demons today. Have a great weekend.

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GINGERLY4 9/21/2012 10:09AM


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GARDENSFORLIFE 9/21/2012 10:01AM

You have spoken the truth!
I stay as far away from the negative/ nasty /mean spirited people as possible.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 9/21/2012 9:59AM

    'scue me . . . have a snake or two to deal with!

You have definitely nailed it. Great blog.

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CATHGREEN8 9/21/2012 9:27AM

    Wow! You nailed it! I have met each of these throughout my life. some you can walk away from, but some are related so you can't really walk away from them, but we all need to learn how to keep them at arms length.

And this inspires me to watch my words, so I am not perceived to be a hyena or clueless. I am pretty confident that I am not a vulture or snake.

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CHOCOHIPPO 9/21/2012 9:26AM

    Boy can I relate to today's blog. I've dealt with all of those people and choose to "let it go" a lot of the time. But I was raised by a snake and it took a lot of therapy and a final cutting of ties to let go of it. What I learned was to break the old "not good enough" tape that played in my head whenever something went wrong or I made a mistake, and replaced it with "you are a good person who sometimes makes mistakes --and learns from them". Every once in a while a new copy of that old tape crops up, but is easily replaced by the new one now, after years of work. Yes, we wear our issues outwardly, but along with the extra skin and fat, comes a lot of compassion, empathy and caring as evidenced in this amazing Spark community. And the strength, honesty, openness and caring that people, like yourself, give in the Spark world is an incredible gift.

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    Fantastic blog--thank you!

I was also reminded of Orson Welles' remark about himself, about wearing one's flaw on the outside, that gluttony is not a secret vice.

Thank you again for writing this.

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DISAPPEARING1 9/21/2012 9:20AM


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BMW9295 9/21/2012 9:05AM

    This is FANTASTIC, AMAZING, WONDERFUL! I am so sorry that you have had to deal with all this as I have, but so grateful that you have the courage to write about it and share it with us. I appreciate the time and effort you put into your blogs as they remind me of what and why I am dealing with things I do. This on was just like hitting a nail on the head for me. Thanks again! I really needed this. emoticon emoticon

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IOWAGRAMMA 9/21/2012 9:03AM

    I"m going SNAKE hunting right now!! Thanks, once again, Sheryl! emoticon emoticon

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APPLEPIEAPPLE 9/21/2012 8:59AM


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WILSON1926 9/21/2012 8:58AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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