Thursday, September 20, 2012
It's kind of sad. I look at my last blog which was over a month ago and I am no where near that motivated anymore. I haven't worked out in the past week. I stopped doing the last chance workout about 2 weeks ago. I tried to keep up the exercise though by just going walking. Slowly but surely I'm falling right back into the old habits and I'm stuck at 199/200 range. Why does it seem so easy for others to lose the weight? Why can't it be that easy for me? I'm just really upset and disgusted with myself. I feel like a quiter and a loser for not being able to meet the littlest of goals. I don't even drink 8 cups of water a day anymore. It's like my body or mind got tired of doing all the healthy stuff. I hate myself for not being able to stick with it. I know, I know! Just pick yourself back up! And I'm trying. It's just so hard to stay motivated when I don't really see any results. I try to eat less, I try to drink water, and I try to exercise. Don't know what it is about myself that I just keep holding myself back. I see all these pictures of this skinny girls and it depresses the crap out of me because I know that I will never look like them and I want to feel pretty. Anyway! Guess I'll just pick myself back up and start over tomorrow! What else can I do right?