Yea know what...fine. I'm going to blow the lid off it. I'm just going to admit it.
I... have a fear of public pools.
(Everyone laughs). I know its silly, but its real, and serious. I am just scared that they don't have enough chlorine and I'm going to catch something, not to mention there is like other peoples skin cells, and hair, and God only knows what else in the water.
I'm letting this out of the bag, cause I want to exercise by swimming at the YMCA.
I'm hoping by swimming more I'll get more self confidence, and be comfortable in a bathing suite.
My real big dream is to learn how to surf, and then enjoy the sport in Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic.
I want to live in a south east coast town, have a cute well trained dog and come home from helping children speak better (I already do that), and then swim in the ocean everyday after and/or before work.
(I know everyone is thinking this girl is crazy, she's scared of a lack of chlorine but not the ocean, where there are sharks, jellyfish, and all sorts of bacteria?!!)
It is because of the waves, I'm in love with them. They genuinely say something to my soul. Lakes, rivers, and ponds are all great, and would not be able to stand land without them, but waves...waves wake my soul up.
I've just recently turned 26, and I want to enjoy the freedom and independence I've worked so hard to get. I don't want to let the rest of my life slipping by just watching others do fun things I want to do. So it starts here, admitting I have a fear.
Most importantly, I have to do something about it. I'm not exactly sure just yet. (There is still part of my brain hoping I can get to the beach scene without ever having to get in a public pool. LOL)
But for now I will really make that pledge to BELIEVE in my self, and take the little steps of eating healthy and getting exercise day in and day out!
Matt Schwartz erotic and beautiful Polaroid series, She Hit Pause: