Thursday, September 13, 2012
The food demon in my head came out to play yesterday. She's been laying low for a couple of months now. Maybe she saw my resolve to get healthy and decided to wait until I was vulnerable to show her ugly face. I have been feeling a little shaky over the past couple of days - lots of food cravings, less motivation than usual - and I think at least part of it has to do with PMS. In any case, that crafty little demon saw her opportunity and took it.
The day started out innocently enough, but before long I found myself rummaging through the kitchen looking for something to snack on. The demon was awake and whispering in my ear: "Just a little something won't kill you... You've been doing so good! You deserve a splurge... Wouldn't something salty and delicious taste SO GOOD right now?" I knew I should ignore her, but it was one of those days where I just didn't have the willpower to shut her down.
By the end of the day, on top of my planned meals, I ate half a cup of peanuts, two Eggo waffles slathered in butter and syrup (I don't even like waffles all that much!), and a 2 oz bag of potato chips. That doesn't even sound like much of a binge when I see it written out, but all that extra food added 1,000 calories to my day, for a grand total of 2,500. The dumbest part? Today is my weigh-in day, and while I know it's not a *true* weight-gain, I gained 2 lbs for the week.
Bottom line, though? Yesterday is in the past. There is nothing I can change about it now, and the WORST thing I could do is repeat my patterns from the past and use yesterday's "failure" as an excuse to quit altogether and go back to my old ways. I WILL NOT DO THAT. Not this time around. Looking at my weekly reports, I still burned more than I ate last week, and yesterday was the first day in months that I ate more than I burned in any given day. That's pretty damn good! And this weight I gained? It will be gone (and then some) by Monday if I jump right back into my healthy routine today.
So I'm gonna let it go and move forward. I'm locking my food demon back in her dungeon. I know she'll come out again another day, but I plan on creating a few strategies to better deal with her next time (something I can write down and keep close by). Hopefully she'll get smaller and smaller the deeper I go into this journey. If not, so be it. I'll just have to keep fighting the good fight!