Eleven years ago, I was on my way to work listening to a book on tape as I often did on my commute. I walked into the office to chaos and tears. The twin towers had been struck and America was under attack. I often wonder about the people who were just going about their daily routine that day. Did they know that they were vulnerable? Did they fear that the planes striking the buildings meant inevitable death? Did they feel good that they lived their lives fully and well, even if they were to be cut short?

When my father was passing from cancer, he wrote us all a note encouraging us to live our lives to the fullest. To experience and enjoy the highs while enduring and learning from the lows. I had always played it safe. I hovered in the lows feeling somewhat like a victim. I always appreciated the highs. And I ate all my feelings which I felt was a way to anesthetize myself from the pain. But it really didn't. It only caused more pain as I regretted how I looked and felt, bloated, fat and devoid of energy.

Five years ago, I made a choice to change my life and my lifestyle. I've had my ups and downs, but I'm proud to say that I'm now living my life fully, experiencing my feelings to the nth degree whether good or bad, and riding the highs and the lows. I am happy with the way I'm living now, and hope that the people who perished on 9/11 at least left this world knowing that they did too.

I dedicate this blog to the memories of those who perished, the heroes who helped and the innocent we lost eleven years ago.