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    HAPINANA   15,475
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UPSET !! and getting it off my chest now!!

Saturday, September 08, 2012

OK.... I have to get this off my chest right now!!! You know... I live by myself, so me having others sabotage my weight loss doesn't happen (or so I thought) emoticon
My mother (90 yrs old) is in an assisted care facility and I go to see her every Sat. and Mon., to pickup and take back her laundry for her to save her $$.
Today I was so excited breaking my plateau and losing 3 Lb., being at my lowest so far!! So I tell her, right? She looks at me and says.... wow!! 25 Lb.? "It sure DOESN'T look like it!.... emoticon
Yea...so that burst my bubble! Obviously still bothering me cuz it happened about 3 hrs. ago. She has always done this sort of !##$! to me..... no wonder I turn to food??
Well..don't worry, I'm not this time! But, why do people have to be so cruel, because just the day prior my daughter-in-law said, "Wow, you've lost more weight, huh?"
I know some of you will say, Oh, she's old...blah blah blah....! She knows what she's doing, and that's outright "mean".
Oh, bad daughter, bad daughter....
OK...I'm done, I'm bloggin and gettin it "out".... THERE IT WENT!!!! emoticon
Gonna go make me a nice salad w/ vegs, tuna, etc.... Yummy...! emoticon
Thanks for listening SparkBuddies!! emoticon
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STEPH-KNEE 9/9/2012 9:09PM

    I am so proud of you for breaking through your plateau and doing amazing! I am glad you held your composure and are not turning to food! Such a great accomplishment, and you are going to keep on pushing and get to your goal. I am so proud of you! emoticon

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123ELAINE456 9/9/2012 4:20PM

  Congratulations on your 3 pound weight lost. My family has treated me like that all my life. It has ruin my life. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week. Stay away from people who puts you down. Its takes it toll on you life. It is'nt worth it being around them. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week. You are doing good. Keep It Up.

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JEANNE229 9/9/2012 1:38PM

    When my mom first got dimentia, she did things like that to me, too. She'd always been a kind mom, so I just didn't know how to handle the mean streak that came out (she called me her fatty daughter almost every time I saw her and told me she didn't know why my husband stayed with me).

Really!

I was bigger than I should be, but not THAT big. Nothing worse than a mom's stinging words. I have since assigned it to her illness. Soon she even forgot who I was and I actually wished she'd still call me her daughter, fatty or not.

Three pounds is amaing! Better to get the "hurt" off your chest than to put it back on your tighs (smile).

Comment edited on: 9/9/2012 1:39:21 PM

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HEATHERFREE 9/9/2012 12:23PM

    woohoo on the three pounds!!! And don't listen to your mother! She is old and shes just grumpy cuz your young and happy and doing something good with yourself!!! Get angry about it, vent and let it go....you cant change a thing about what she says or does.....maybe dont do her laundry a couple times hehehehe

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LINDAK25 9/9/2012 11:20AM

    Congratulations on losing 3 lbs! That's fantastic. I don't have anyone who sabotages my diet, either, other than my mother. That's why I haven't discussed losing weight or Spark with her!
It doesn't matter how old you are or how many times this has happened before, it's still upsetting when your mom doesn't support you! Maybe it's time to stop doing the same thing and expecting different results. It took me forever to figure this out! Accept the fact that she is never going to be warm and fuzzy and stop expecting that. When my mom chooses to be nice, I have time for her. When she's being spiteful, I find other places to be and things to do. I've decided that there is no place for toxic, negative people in my life. I'm much happier now!

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SANDYW1945 9/9/2012 8:47AM

    Some people are such jerks. That includes our mothers. I know your pain.
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LOVINSHERRY78 9/9/2012 8:14AM

    this makes me think of a quote i have on my computer... " i love a hater b/c they motivate me". not that your mom is a hater per say, lol...but like you said...she knows what she's saying.
so glad you didn't let it turn you to digress!! you know some of my personal situations at home and one thing i've have had to learn is those that like to bring us down need to be the ones who push us forward. it's like a race car..as soon as the negative comments hits..you get a turbo boost!!
OFF YA GO! vrooooom!! emoticon
here's to getting to the finish line...b/c by golly...we will!!! emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/9/2012 8:17:49 AM

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BLUEBIRDSFLY 9/8/2012 11:16PM

    Ah, screw it. Seriously. We all have to learn to blow it out the other ear and not take stuff to heart that is intended to be hurtful. You have a community of people here who have your back and believe that 25 pounds is an extraordinary achievement. Really!!! We can't control what comes out of other people's mouths but we are all learning how to react to words meant to hurt without hurting ourselves. I am glad to hear you are busy making a salad. I am sorry your mother has not yet learnt how wonderful it is to share in another person's joy. Because it truly is a wonderful thing. So congraulations on your weight loss and I wish you continued success.
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CHRISKENANDKIDS 9/8/2012 10:55PM

    My husband's aunt is like that. She said on Facebook once, "If you weight 160 pounds how can you be in a size 8?" Ugh. Of course, my answer was - "It's called muscle!" She has NOOOO filter and I don't think really cares. You should be proud of yourself! Congratulations!

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AGK3112 9/8/2012 9:52PM

    First of all Congrats..I am so happy for you. I wish I could do it. I am been trying to lose and what I get is just a same. I have not lost a bit since 1 month. When I checked my weight day before yesterday it said the same..got so frustrated..and then checked out inch..1 inch lost..that did cheer me up a little..

Congrats one more time and good luck on your next goal

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ANGELWENDYMAMA 9/8/2012 9:30PM

    Hugs..
well, 25 lbs is a LOT and congratulations to you for that!! And hurray for the plateau breaking and going down another 3 lbs! WOOHOO!!!!

I'm sorry your mom wasn't more encouraging. She is lucky you keep going and helping her with the laundry. Rise above it. You are being the 'bigger' person, so to speak, by continuing to visit her despite her attitude toward you.

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VIMVIGOR 9/8/2012 8:16PM

  I think we must be sisters because it looks like we have the same mother. I waited so many years for my mother to say something positive about me or to me, finally I realized it just was not going to happen. I was just setting myself up to be knocked down. It still hurts if I think about it. But I know it's not me, it's her. That does help.
emoticon 3 pounds is emoticon . Keep up the good work. emoticon emoticon

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MSBOOTCAMP 9/8/2012 7:59PM

    But... from how you wrote this, YOU ALREADY KNEW THIS ABOUT YOUR MOTHER. Leopards don't change their spots.

You left yourself wide open for "rejection" by expecting encouraging feedback from her!
You deserve better-- from YOURSELF.

The only behaviour you control is YOUR OWN.

You could have said, "Hey, Mom, can you give me some positive feedback about me?"- and see what she would say. But you have to be ready for that to not go the way you want.

BOTTOM LINE: You lost THREE POUNDS. You did this for yourself and you're on the right track. We don't get everything in this life. Enjoy your own journey and be thankful for those other folks who DO AFFIRM YOU!

You're a nice daughter helping your Mom with her weekly wash.

Cheers!

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LEN_VERSION32 9/8/2012 7:53PM

    I totally understand how you feel. Went on the scale the other day and lost 4lbs...my co-worker who is young says to me "you have put on weight"...smh...the nerve! Just keep pushing!!

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CHERIONE 9/8/2012 7:51PM

    emoticon emoticon

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CLUMBOY 9/8/2012 7:45PM

    my sister in law and i once had a conversation similar to this, and her observation was--"you know, there are people in your life you have to guard your happiness from." even though your mom is your mom and you love her and she loves you, this may be an area you need to protect from her. just don't bring things like that up with her--share them with friends whom you know you can trust with this precious joy. you deserve to be happy about your accomplishment. all the best!

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DIABETICLADY 9/8/2012 7:41PM

  I'm almost 70 years old and I'm STILL LEARNING one has to THINK BEFORE ONE SPEAKS.

More often then not, as I have learned one's efforts often aren't recognized and are often trivialized.

CONGRATS on your achievement; just realize YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF YOUR OWN GOALS. Keep moving forward and don't look back..

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