Mind over matter - To eat or not to eat the cake/chocolate/nuts/

Friday, September 07, 2012

You really want to eat that piece of cake, chocolate etc. Guess what you deliberate about it and then you cave. Beck calls this weakening your resistance muscle. To me it's what happens afterwards that makes all the difference.

When I think life is black and white (most of my life I have thought that way) I tend to stay away from the food mentioned above for weeks on end. Usually, at a social setting (not work) I get tempted and once I start I can't stop. Or I don't start at the social gathering because everyone knows I'm the health freak...as soon as I come home I start searching for junk food and end up eating my kids treats etc because I was good at the social event. Again without being able to stop.

For someone who has never been their I may sound like I'm not really all there ;-). Seriously, it's a really childish attitude to think oh oh I caved so I might as well finish the whole box and some. Worse thought is well I didn't have this stuff for months so now I need to have it more and more because it tastes so good.

First approach was to try and limit to the weekend. Guess what that didn't work either because the thought is still I'm so good during the week why should I not have it all. The other day I was thinking about a dress shop (I guess not fitting into any of my clothes is getting to me). When I go in, there are about 12-15 outfits I like. I then narrow it down to 1-3 before I leave the shop. If I had money I could buy all 12 but I don't. This is the same way I should treat my body. There is not enough "money" to eat all I see. The body has capacity only for some of it. I should be choosy of my treats.

Last night we ate out I had a great salad and took sips of milkshakes from my kids. I didn't feel deprived and I had an adult drink (cappuccino). I don't need to eat a full portion of anything and everything.

I have made healthy nuttella from three ingredients. Roasted hazelnuts, 100% cocoa and almond milk. That way if I feel an urge for something sweet I can have it , and not feel deprived. I also have jam for pbj which I like to have on apples/rice crackers.

I think it's important to remember to breath and realize that the world won't collapse if we eat some food that's on our "naughty" list. It's what we do afterwards that causes us to go into a spiral of guilt and giving up.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I had snacks tonight. I have been recovering from a surgery for the last few days. I felt that I needed something of a treat nature. I did eat all but I think it is OK. I had the serotonin boost from it and I can feel I had that now and get back on the wagon tomorrow. I don't want to beat myself up for it.

    I think you are weighing things out for yourself and finding your balance.

    Keep up the good work...One day at a Time! emoticon
    2019 days ago
  • OOLALA53
    It's really not a childish attitude; it's TYPICAL of people who diet or restrict foods for a long time, but it's also following the thought, "I might as well go all out." Psychologists call it the what-the-hell syndrome, and it's often not just with food.

    Beck helps with that. (NO CHOICE beforehand; Oh, well, if you crack. Notice she never recommends berating oneself afterwards.)

    I had (and still sometimes have) trouble with overeating on the weekends, even through my weight loss and maintenance over 32 months. I don't think it's fair to judge what happens with that in just a few weeks. It takes longer and the truth is there is likely not much that will make it go more quickly; maybe something will look like it's working, but it's often temporary, too. But the fact that you saw you could have sips and have that be fun and enough is big, too. It will likely go and come, but recognizing that it really is more fun to have just enough-- even if it takes 100 times-- is going to make the difference, IMHO. I know my weekends are getting better and better. I've been able to determine that about two (or less) extra fists of dense food on weekends is enough. Sometimes eating a lot less starch and having dessert is good, too.

    Anyway, you are working this out! Individual failures are not a sign of overall failure.
    2019 days ago

    I really like what you mentioned about a childish attitude. As a binge eater of a lifetime, that encompasses my attitude of "I want to eat anything I want and as much as I want".
    Obviously that's not the way adults think. They have loving limits on themselves.

    Thanks for your blog!

    blessings, Sue
    2019 days ago
    I can soooooooo relate to the "I've caved" attitude.
    You really hit the nail on the head with the last line of your blog.
    "It's what we do afterwards" that can make us or break us.
    I love reading your blog. It always makes me "Think" :)
    Have a wonderful weekend with your family !
    2020 days ago
    Excellent outlook! I LOLed about the resisting treats at social gatherings because people see you as the "health freak." I've had that situation at work a lot ... then I stop for a milkshake on the way home from work. Great blog!
    2020 days ago
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