Hi all! This Saturday I'm participating in the Tough Mudder Wisconsin event. I am starting to believe I have lost my mind.

I promised my friends I would sign up after they finished last year's event. I reasoned that I had a year to get ready. Well, that year is gone and instead of losing the 60 pounds I had planned on losing, I lost 30.

I also haven't built up to the point where I can do an unassisted pull-up, or even push-ups on my toes. I'm very close, but close only counts...well, you know.

(This is as close as I can get to horseshoes & hand grenades, in case you were wondering...)

So, I'm starting to worry. I'm thinking about ways of backing out without looking like a wuss. (Which I am, but I don't like to acknowledge that too often, you know?)


I'm running through the race and coming up with all the horrible things that could happen. This is a trait I picked up from my mother (thanks, Mom!). Bear with me as I run through some of them...

-I could fall on my face
-I could fall on my face in the first obstacle
-I could fall on my face in the first obstacle and break my nose
-I could fall on my face in the first obstacle and break my nose, dying instantly
-I could fall off one of the height obstacles, and get stuck in the mud and suffocate

You get the point. My worry meter is off the charts! I'm pretty sure I'm not going to die, but my mother is not a risk-taker and instilled an abnormally high level of fear into my soul.

The more realistic fears I have are:
-I won't be able to finish
-I will have to skip many obstacles
-People will laugh at me
-The people helping others will not want to help me because I'm too heavy...230 pounds is a lot to haul
-I will hurt myself (I know I will fall - everyone falls in this event - and I fall hard)

After last week's half-marathon debacle, I'm even more concerned.
I know I should just suck it up and do the event, but I really feel like I don't belong. This is an event for tougher people than I.

Any suggestions? Any Mudder finishers out there have an opinion?