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    GONABFITCOWGIRL   20,358
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Big Hot Mess

Thursday, September 06, 2012

Ok my friends.. things are not going well for me and this is completely an emotional issue that i am having. fyi this is a really depressing blog so dont read it if you're looking for motivation b/c i have none :( sorry guys.

I know better than to think that I will get immediate results from working out and eating better but i feel like my results should be better than they are. I killed my workout minutes goal, seriously i had over 1000 minutes and my goal was half of that. i burned enough calories to lose a pound a week and i def did not lose a pound a week.

Now i know what you are all thinking... its my eating. And you're totally right!!! i had great great great streaks and i didn't eat fast food for over 60 days! hello milestone, like thats incredible for me. but whenever i eat healthy there is always this voice in my head like "if i wasn't trying to be healthy i could be eating a delicious burger and fries right now" so why am i not losing when i am eating significantly better? I just dont freaking get it.

I know i need to start tracking my food, but freaking suck at it and can never ever get into a rhythm. I think even when i eat healthy, i still manage to go over on my calories.. BAD BAD BAD.

ugh i just dont know what to do. Part of me just wants to give up but that is a teany tiny part of me and i wont let that win. I keep going back to thinking that i should do a round of HCG again with 800 cal a day like i did last year and had amazing result with but then i just feel like that is sooooo not healthy. dont do it.. or do it.. or dont.. idk. Scott keeps encouraging me to do it because i had such great results but i feel like it wont solve my problems. :( ohhh decisions decisions

Can someone please please please give me some advice and help me or help me get help? I'm not giving up but i feel like i'm never making any progress no matter what i do. :/

To make things worse i'm having issues everywhere else in my life. I've started to think that i'm crazy and now after doing some research it sort of looks like i may have a mild form of OCD, but i def need to see a therapist before that can be confirmed. I apparently screwed up and took the wrong class this summer which jeopardized my graduation in may, but now i'm just picking up another class and taking 20 credits this semester and have to pay $600 for that extra class. I have no idea where that money will come from but i will have to do it. And my trainer raised my board so now its $300/month which is too much and i dont want to move my horse but she thinks its not good for my horse to be rough boarded which i see her point but I may have to consider moving my horse and there are so limited options in my area. AHHHH can you see why i am going crazy?

ok any advice or comforting words would be appreciated, thanks for listening spark friends!

emoticon you guys are the best.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VANESSAVOS13 9/7/2012 6:06PM

    Hey, I'm sad to read this blog because I know exactly how you feel. Last year I tried and tried to lose weight and those pounds just would NOT come off. I tracked my food, worked out like a maniac, and nothing. I think it has a lot to do with how you feel about yourself, and the chaos going on in your life. I know for me I was with someone who preferred me when I was heavy, and did not encourage me at all (you know, you've read my blogs), and I feel like he kept me fat. I mean, it's definitely not the same situation for you, but I know that now since I have cleared my life of that I don't feel so horrible about myself. I am the same weight as last year, but I feel better about myself. I have stopped focusing on the scale, in fact, I rarely weigh myself. I definitely do not want you doing HCG. Don't do it. Just keep eating healthy. All of these other comments are true, track your food, write down what you eat, drink tons and tons of water, add lemon, add green tea, just keep yourself hydrated. Keep working at it, it will come. Don't forget that you've had a lot of stress in your life and you are still working hard at it which means you are dedicated, and that's the first step.
*hugs*!

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GOLMAR25 9/7/2012 10:18AM

    Calories are calories no matter how healthy they are. Even if you live on fruits and veggies and consume 2500 calories a day you will still gain weight. That's just the way it is unfortunatelly. Track everything you eat, stay within range (NOT 800 cal/day), workout regularily and you will see results in no time! I'm in it with you hun!! I hope you see some great results soon! emoticon

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IAMZBEE 9/6/2012 4:40PM

    This may not be pretty, but I really, really, really want you to succeed!

1. Don't do HCG. Here's the thing: it's a nice, quick fix, but you don't learn any lifestyle habits that you can take with you. It is not healthy to eat 800 cals a day (nor will your body accept it).

2. Your "eating healthy" may not be as healthy as you think. But, that all comes from lifestyle changes. You become more aware of the foods you take in.

3. If you've got the exercise part down, you HAVE to get the food part down. First step is to track. Don't even track for the calorie range... you can even use just a basic little notebook. Track to see WHAT you're putting into your body. Once you realize what is going in, you probably need to start tracking for the calories. After that, start researching the "clean" way of eating. There are many variations of it, such as the original Eat Clean diet, but there's also Paleo, etc. You need to nip the eating habits in the butt.

But, I KNOW you can do this. emoticon

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NMINDSEYE 9/6/2012 3:45PM

    I'm working on getting on track with weight loss and right now I'm using the food tracker to track food whether good or bad to just get back in the habit of tracking. So far, it is working. Also having a few frozen dinners in refrigerator as a backup when I need some quickly. I also agree with preplanning and prepackaging food to have on hand. Also, are you drinking enough water? That can help with keeping you full. You're doing great with the fitness. Don't give up with food. emoticon

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NMINDSEYE 9/6/2012 3:43PM

    I'm working on getting on track with weight loss and right now I'm using the food tracker to track food whether good or bad to just get back in the habit of tracking. So far, it is working. Also having a few frozen dinners in refrigerator as a backup when I need some quickly. I also agree with preplanning and prepackaging food to have on hand. Also, are you drinking enough water? That can help with keeping you full. You're doing great with the fitness. Don't give up with food. emoticon

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SQUIRRELLYONE 9/6/2012 3:03PM

    If you don't like tracking your food, what about preplanning? If you meal plan and set out all the day's food ahead of time it will A) be ready to go and portable for what will soon be a crazy school schedule, and B) you will know what you are eating without having to remember to track at the end of the day. Or you could use the sparkpeople app (free) to track as you eat.

What I'm going to suggest may be shocking, but you should looking into foods that aren't just healthy, but are also delicious! I never look at a fast-food joint and think "YUM!" any more: instead, I look at it as "crap, I need to eat now, I'm far from home, and this is cheap". A 3 oz steak is WAAAAAAY tastier than any fast food burger, and better for you. Or you could have a salmon & goat cheese pesto-pasta with frozen veggies for the same amount of calories in a Big Mac... and be super-full and feel awesome!

If you are looking to go that route, you can build a sparkpeople cookbook and try all kinds of things from there :)

Feel free to message me if you need more ideas... I LOVE food :)

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BONOLICIOUS2 9/6/2012 2:27PM

    I haven't done HCG myself, but I try to steer clear from "quick fixes" - you know what I mean? Slow and steady wins the race, and it will keep the weight from coming back.

I'm making food choices like that too, and haven't been able to force myself to track either. But you DID this before, you went a whole streak without fast food! You ARE capable! Maybe you can do some self digging and get to the roots of why you want to be fit? I'm trying to do the same and it is helping a bit. I have that same stupid voice too! I think it is important to note that it is not like you can NEVER have that burger and fries again, but maybe do it once a week and only if you've killed it on workouts? Sometimes that voice tries to tell me it is the end of the world that I can't have XYZ, but then I'm like... hey. Cool it. I'm going to be good today, and enjoy myself tomorrow.

20 credits?! Yikes girl! GOOD LUCK!







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JUDYHELP 9/6/2012 2:14PM

  emoticon emoticon sorry that your having a difficult time. And your not crazy just to many things hitting you at one time. You can not give up because your worth it. You need to track your food and see where your at. How many calories are you to have a day? I think if you log everything down (good or bad) it will give a better prospective. I hope that you try it the healthy way, but I understand that you need to do what is better for you. Stress also can make you eat things that isn't the best for you, trust me, been there done that. Take several deeps breaths and focus. You can do this. emoticon emoticon Judy

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