Wednesday, September 05, 2012
Today started out well. At the last minute, I decided to walk to the grocery store instead of driving my car at 0600 this morning. I needed to get fixings for Emma's lunch and I wanted to get my walk in. So I killed 2 birds with one stone. Everything I purchased except one item was for Em. It was that one item that turned my day into a rough one: a bag of Doritos-family sized no less.
So I dropped Emma off to daycare, came home and made my protein shake with Vi shape mix, strawberries and peaches. Within that hour, I had opened the bag and had 2 bowls of Doritos. Then I went back for more. Eventually I found myself drifting into a carb induced sleep. I woke up and then after an hour had some more.
DH came home and we talked for a bit. Then I came back to the bedroom and polished off the remainder of the bag. I got ready to go pick Emma up and was completely disgusted with myself. That lovely bag left me feeling like crap, I had an attitude with people and I was weepy all at the same time.
As I walked to my car, I knew I would be writing a blog about this. You see, for me, this past year, I made some big strides in part of my carb addictions. Last July I went on a no sugar diet. Only thing I had for that month was fresh fruit. I eventually went back but stayed away completely from ice cream to this day. In January, I expanded that to all sugar except for fruit. So I've fought the sugar demon with the help of God. Now I know I need to do the same with chips. Last month I got into junk crunchy snacks like Pringles (sour cream & onion only), Cheetos and Doritos. I've kicked the first two to the curb. Now I need to do the same with the last. The only way I can do this is by turning to & leaning on God. I have to do the work. He will be my strength! I cannot do it alone.
I wanted to share this here where I feel safe and can be myself. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. I plan to continue blogging here so I can stay accountable. I'm so grateful to have SP on this journey. I'm determined to do this!!