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What is it about Fridays and Revelations?

Friday, August 31, 2012

Last Friday, was a revelation of sorts, one of just a feeling of being in Total Control of my journey.

Today, another revelation. We have a family function tomorrow. My son's 25th b-day and he is having a BBQ at his farm. He has a 100 acre place with a bluff view over the Missouri River. Just gorgeous. And he is building a new home out there. I am very proud of him. Anyways, it will be a working BBQ also, to help him get a few things done on the new house, and his Father is very handy with things like that, and helping him do a great deal of the work. Therein lies my dilemma. Most all family functions with my oldest 3 children, usually means family functions with the X and X-In-Laws. The out laws emoticon

I shouldnt say that, they are all good people. But just the idea of a family function use to send me into a tizzy. What to wear, what will everyone think of my weight gain, just so uncomfortable, would rather have root canal .. blah blah blah.

However now it seems different. I am not afraid to go, I am not afraid of not having anything to wear. Before, I just had a few go-to items. Now, I have many more options. So....as I am hanging up my clothes and thinking of potential contenders, I had my Friday Revelation. I realized that Every Single Thing that I wear, looks better than the LAST time I wore it. And I further realized that every single person I see, I will look better than the last time they saw me. I realized that I just get better and better every. single. day.

And not that I feel like I need to impress anyone, I mean it has been almost 20 years and it's all water under the bridge, however I just don't like that feeling of thinking that I am not good enough. I mean there were times in the last few years that I even felt I was not good enough to be the mother of my children. They are all beautiful and gorgeous, inside and out. And I just felt so unworthy.

Okay, so I am past all that. Don't want to go down that road in this blog, but I will some day. But for today, I realized that I am already weighing less than when I started to became anti-social and make excuses not to go here and there. So from here on out, I will just get better looking every time I see someone. So while I really don't care what anyone thinks anymore, part of me does want to say, even if only a silent thought, Eat your heart out Mr. X. emoticon
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NOREGRET2010 9/5/2012 8:19AM

    what breathing woman doesn't want to look good when faced with a family gathering that includes exes and their new spouses? I'm so happy for you that you had the realization, that the gal had the class to compliment you, all of it!

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LIVINGFREE19 9/4/2012 4:35PM

    I read your blog after this one first, and it was kind of sad, all the worrying you did, and the X wife said you look great!
Hold your head up high anywhere girl, and rock it...whatever you are wearing!!


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MNABOY 9/1/2012 10:02PM

    You are really doing well, keep it up!

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LABRATIAM 9/1/2012 7:44AM

    emoticon Eat your heart out is right!

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SHANSHE 8/31/2012 9:43PM

    emoticon , so happy for you!
Shan

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OKBACK2ME 8/31/2012 8:08PM

    Sounds like your self-esteem is improving. emoticon

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SAINTBETH 8/31/2012 8:00PM

    Good for you!

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XENATHOMAS 8/31/2012 6:58PM

    emoticon

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TINYBUBBA1 8/31/2012 5:11PM

    You go, Girl!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Tiny emoticon

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SUSANS706 8/31/2012 4:39PM

    emoticon Great blog, and I hope you have a great time!

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