Sunday, August 26, 2012
Ok, introduce is a bit strong as I'm not dragging him on to spark but announce didn't sound quite right. Yes folks, 7 weeks after meeting him I think I can safely confirm his permanent status in my life for the foreseeable future so I finally feel happy telling people about him.
He may (?!) also be partly the reason that I've been around less so it's only fair that I give him a mention in any update. I'd been starting to step away from tracking during the summer anyway, tracking on those days I ate at work/home but simply eating sensibly and not tracking when I was going out. That seemed to work for a while to stabilise my eating but since meeting him (side note: I need a label - bf? so? P - I'll go with P as that's his initial), we've been doing a lot of cooking together so it's been harder to track and I've finally stepped away from it completely, through no intentional method at all. I do think I'm eating fractionally poorer choices when I'm with him but I'm pleased to say he has a healthy awareness of food and I haven't found I've been eating really poorly with him, which I was always afraid of when I met someone. Next steps: learn the basics of intuitive eating.
On the exercise front I'm doing well with keeping up the 3 runs a week according to my plan (and even adjusted it already to make it harder). I can feel myself getting stronger, though still going at a snail's pace compared to the rest of the world. I've realised that hitting the treadmill early on a Monday morning is a great way to avoid the whole 'eugh it's back to work day' thing. I can deal with 'eugh, am I really going to the gym this early?' a whole lot better!
As ever, my ST needs a kick up the back side, but it is happening. I'm struggling with the 100 push ups program but am chipping away at it bit by bit. Must do better all round here. And the other area I must do better is stretching and massage. That's the one thing that I've reduced since meeting P as it's so boring that I don't want to prioritise it. I know I must because without it, the exercise is pointless (I've been 'blessed' with muscles that tighten up a ridiculous amount upon beginning exercise).
My sleep has improved drastically since meeting P. Simple reason why: I'm more relaxed and don't wake up stressed in the middle of the night. Having said that, September has been designated Better Sleep Month so that I get more hours, not just better quality.
My job search has sadly stalled as it's sooo boring. Instead I'm just trying not to constantly complain about it, and am starting up volunteering again next week. I genuinely don't know how my life is going to fit into itself any more, but I'm working on a few basic principles:
- The more you do, the more you fit in [I hardly watch any TV any more and I think that proves I'm making better use of time!]
- P and I will see each other as often as we can but are both keen to keep our own lives going separately.
- My priorities will come out in the wash: if it all gets too much I'll work out what I really want to focus my time on by what I'm showing most commitment too (which is why the gym hasn't taken a back seat)
- These are all things I'm choosing. The problem of fitting all of these things in a 1st world problem and I'm very lucky to have it, and even luckier now to have someone to stand by me and help me with the choices I'm choosing to make. I read a great blog entry recently about it being stuff I 'get' to do, not stuff I 'have' to do.
There, I've made it through this news update without going on about my wonderful new man too much. I'm trying not to bore people too much, but I feel it's important to note that had I met him this time last year, I don't think we would have got together. I wasn't happy enough with myself then to accept that someone else might be.
It's an amazing feeling to value yourself enough to let someone else value you too. THAT is what spark has given me.