Well when I wrote that last blog I said I had gained some of my lost weight back and made it sound recent. Today, after posting my first loss in a long while that I feel I earned....I went back through SP and really took a look at what happened.
Jan 2009 to Jan 2010 I lost 100 pounds
Jan 2010 to August 2010 I lost about 5 pounds. I was on a horrible plateau I couldn't seem to break out of- I honestly was still following plan, exercising, doing everything right. But I became pretty discouraged because of how things were going. I went to my Dr., we tried ups and downs in calories and exercise. Nothing. How I wish I had just hung on. I didn't.
August 2010 to August 2011: I gained back 40 pounds of what I'd lost.
August 2011 to August 2012: I have gained another 20 back this year. BUT, I am DETERMINED to lose that and more before the end of this year.
I wish I had just stayed the course. I wish I had realized that eventually that plateau would have broken and even if it didn't, wasn't I healthier and happier at 105 pounds lost than where I am (again) now? I can tell you I WAS. I felt better, could do almost anything, fit into almost any chair. I had lost a lot of my fears about traveling and being out in the world. And now I am here again, beginning again.
It was good to look back today, though, and see that there were some positives.
In the past any time I'd lost any weight at all I had put it all back on within months...this has been 2 years and I've put back about 1/2 of it back.. which, while sucky, is still progress.
This year has not been the train wreck I thought it was. I let myself get to the point where I felt I'd gained 100 pounds just this year...I felt slow and sick and tired and sore and....well, if you've ever been 200 pounds overweight you'd know what I mean. In reality- I did gain 20 pounds but not 100. And I need to recognize I am not a lost cause.
If I learn from this, I will have no regrets. My only regret would be to continue the pattern.
Summer is almost over here, Fall is approaching quickly. I am ready to move forward.