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Tough Goodbyes

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Sometimes we get to say goodbye, and sometimes there isn't an opportunity or a time to do that. My hope for many Spark friends is that you do get the chance to say goodbye. Whether it is a friend moving away, or moving on to a new job, or having a really tough and sorrowful time of sending someone on to the other side. I think we deserve and need this important step, regardless of circumstance.

I have had this opportunity many times, but there is a time I didn't get to do this. I forgive my parents because of my age at the time and the circumstance...but I did not get to say goodbye to my late sister, who died 34 years ago today. What I remember is the pastor at our church coming for dinner, and we went to the cemetery and I knew she was gone. The words out of my mouth was that I did not want her to die. I was only 3. It is something I really hope a lot of 3 year olds do not have to go through. I hate cancer.

I really try to hold tight to what I remember of my sister, Janet. I remember her with hair. I remember when she had to wear a wig because her hair fell out after chemo treatments. I remember rushing to my Dad to tell him she fell out of bed and needed help. How awfully scary and sad a time that must have been for them, but I was so young and couldn't have that kind of talk with them. Here they were, less than 10 years into their marriage, burying their first-born. Just sad.

I am grateful the Lord blessed them with my sister Jennifer, me, and my brother John. I think we filled their hearts, their arms, and time, with a lot of business so that they could feel what they needed to, but had purpose and a lot of love yet to give us.

I wish my sister was here today, but I know that was not meant to be. Thanks for listening.

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  • GUNNSGIRL91303
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    1680 days ago
    Thank you for sharing. As my sister said, I was also three when my sister June died. That was 72 years ago. My memories aren't clear. My cousin came to visit and brought a family reunion pictuee,In the picture is my mom holding June. Sad memories.


    1680 days ago
    1680 days ago
    Thank you for sharing. I am watching my mother die of Alzheimers..imagine saying goodbye and the other party doesn't remember. Life is not fair, but onward we go.
    1680 days ago
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    1680 days ago
  • 123ELAINE456
    Thank You for sharing this with us. I lost two family members within ten months of each other. Which was very hard on us. Never had a chance to say Good Bye to my Dad. I will see him in Heaven. We all go through things like this in this life. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week. Take Care. We all need to keep on living our lives the best we can.
    1681 days ago
    I never knew my sister, June. But my older sister, Mary, must have been about 3 when June died. We've never talked about it. I wonder if she remembers that time. I'm going to send your blog to her and see if she wants to talk about it. Thanks for sharing this tender moment from your life with your SparkFriends.
    1681 days ago
    That's a hard way to be 3. Makes it tougher being 4, too--or 37. did have a sister...that's something. emoticon
    1681 days ago
    Isn't amazing how people we barely knew impact us for life? I never knew my sister-in-law because she passed before I met her family. She is one of the people I look forward to meeting in heaven! Thanks for putting something so personal out there for other members.
    1681 days ago
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