Thursday, August 16, 2012
I heard of the passing of a friend from high school today. He just celebrated his birthday this past Monday (I believe it was his 45th) and passed the following day. He had an infectious smile, he was uber friendly and truly loved by so many.
I am saddened by his passing. For me when I hear of the passing of a friend, I start thinking of a lot of "life's too short" type of things. Things that run through my head...live life to the fullest, don't take your family and friends for granted, tell those that you love that you in fact love them, speak your mind, but mind how you say it, treat others as you would want to be treated, don't sweat the small stuff (cliché I know, but a lot of us need to be reminded), make time for family and friends, so much more is cycling through my head and will continue to do so for a while.
In addition to all the random thoughts, I also assess my life and how I'm living...oh I'm not so happy with where I'm at today. I'm still ridiculously overweight, financially unfit, and wondering if I'll ever find a lifelong companion, not Mr. perfect, b/c I know he doesn't exist, but someone to share my life with, someone to love and laugh with, it's somewhat terrifying to think of being alone for the next however many years I am meant to be here. What's even more terrifying is that I actually have some control of how many years I live on, but still manage to do harm to my body, by staying unhealthy.
I can make claims that I'll do better and start taking better care of myself, which I do and say often, but never truly commit to...I'm not sure how to get past the brick wall that’s keeping me from loving myself enough to get healthy in all areas of my life. Shouldn't my coughing to regulate my heartbeat be a bright flashing neon sign, shouldn't all my aches and pains, fibroid issues, anemia, menorrhagia be the issues that help me break through the brick wall and get my big butt moving and eating healthier? Shouldn’t the health issues/scares of my family and friends aid in my focus to get healthier? I have this strange feeling that my brick wall is about to crumble, far too many of my years have been wasted living an unhealthy life.
Life’s too short…now that I say it yet again, I feel I really need to make those words part of my daily mantra, but adding to it…”Life’s too short, so live it well (healthily) and with purpose!!!” May we all find a way to demolish that brick wall that hinders us from getting on the path to a healthier life!!