Thursday, August 16, 2012
As I read an entry on the Daily Spark this morning, I realized that I could have written most of it myself. I'm posting this here so I don't make her blog about me, but she made me think. I, too, thought that if you had reasons for being overweight, it meant you were abused. I was fortunate to have had a wonderful family growing up who always believed in me. But I gained some weight when my mother passed away when I was 24 (not a lot of weight) and then a (I thought very good) friend dropped me because she didn't like being around overweight people! She actually said that! I think that her comment, 28 years ago, made me feel like I wasn't worth it. And at the time, I probably had 30 pounds, not 100 to lose! I realized a few years ago that I had let her have incredible power over me so I no longer care what she thinks. I'm sure she doesn't give me a thought. But it has been hard to repair the damage that she caused. I am worth it and, not to judge (okay, I guess I am judging) I am not the sort of shallow person who could hurt someone else that way. But every day that I make bad food choices and don't exercise (more days than not) it reinforces those feelings. Every day I mean to journal, not just food, and I think it would be helpful to see what I do have, what I am good at, why my family and friends love me. I've heard many times that you wouldn't think those things about someone else, why would you think them about yourself. I guess I have a lot of work to do. I so appreciate everyone out there who motivates and inspire. Thank you!