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    ON2VICTORY   47,210
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What I Used To Only Imagine, I Am Now Living.

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Sunday, August 12, 2012

Im tapping this blog out on my phone so please forgive any format issues or typos. Im on midnight shift right now and sometimes my mind drifts.

I feel like my journey is entering a new phase. The whole theme of my journey seems to be centered around YOU CAN and taking baby steps on a path of self discovery. A path where I am learning that the only limits I have are the ones I allow myself to be fettered with. I look back and reflect on my past and I can plainly see a long process where my self confidence and self image died a slow and painful death. When you become morbidly obese, the walls of your world close in slowly until your comfort zone becomes a straitjacket.

I never viewed any challenge as an opportunity for growth, it was always viewed as yet another opening for all the world to see my ineptness and to suffer embarassment.That is one of the things that makes morbid obesity such a killer. We all know about the health side of it but obesity is a destroyer of the soul. This is so much more than shedding the pounds, it is about reclaiming the life.

This is where I feel running and endurance sports has brought so much healing in my life. It is far more than a reduntant process to be endured for the sake of burning a few extra calories in the same sense that one endures the side effects of some medication for the sake of getting well. Once the desired effect is obtained, the routine ends.

Before, I used to just imagine what it would be like to have self confidence and passion, now I am living the dream everyday.

Yes Robert, you can.

I no longer need the permission or the approval of others to finally live my life.Each time I honor a commitment to myself to exercise when I dont feel like it, or work through a problem and see it through, something inside grows stronger.When you climb the smaller mountains, the bigger ones don't seem so intimidating. It takes the same skills. After a while, one rock looks much like another except there are just more of them piled up... I just have to climb a little longer that's all.

One thing I have learned on my journey is that consistant effort is never unrewarded.My dreams are not so far fetched anymore. No bravado, just a deep settled confidence that tells me to keep climbing.

There is Iron at the top.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LAURIE5658 8/13/2012 12:40PM

    Seriously RAWK!!!!

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LIGHTNINGRUNNER 8/13/2012 12:30PM

    You are growing each and every day - I am so impressed by you.

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KATIEM929 8/13/2012 12:23PM

    Just what I needed to read today. Thanks for sharing!
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LTMURPHY7 8/13/2012 12:14PM

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Sorry for duplicate SP closed on me & I thought it didn't register

Comment edited on: 8/13/2012 12:15:21 PM

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LTMURPHY7 8/13/2012 12:12PM

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ESME25 8/13/2012 11:54AM

    emoticon emoticon

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ZZZKATZZZZ 8/13/2012 11:43AM

    You are so right about needing permission from others!!! Thanks for the reminder.

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JSEWELL27 8/13/2012 11:37AM

  Someone provided a link to your blog. You are truly inspiring. Thank you.:)

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DONNA5281 8/13/2012 11:23AM

 
Great blog, reading it just gives so much inspiration to keep on doing what we need to do.


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ONE-HOT-MAMA1 8/13/2012 11:00AM

    i love your blogs it helps me get thought my workouts a little better keep it up

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LULU3561 8/13/2012 10:51AM

    WOW - this really hit home - Thanks for sharing

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RUNNER4LIFE08 8/13/2012 10:46AM

    Your words are beautiful! Such a great feeling to have......

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TRACYNOTGIVINUP 8/13/2012 10:38AM

    What a great blog. I can so relate to everything that you wrote here. You have a wonderful way with words. I hope you continue to blog and inspire! Keep it up.

PS I heard you LOVE....

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LIFECHANGER85 8/13/2012 10:36AM

    You are woth it, awesome blog. Night shifts are killers, I too am a grave yard shirter. Makes the "norm" harder to obtain. Thank you for inspiring me. :)

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SIBLEYHONEYBEE 8/13/2012 10:23AM

    Great blog! You said it better than I ever could. Thank you! I am learning to embrace exercise and it is amazing how much I LOVE myself at the end of a workout! I don't get that feeling doing anything else in life. It feels great to take care of myself!

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TERID816 8/13/2012 10:18AM

    Thanks, again, Robert for another great blog. I especially liked the phrase "honor a commitment to myself to exercise". It is a commitment. We make commitments to others and follow through with an "Nah, it was nothing." Love the thought of doing that for myself! emoticon

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BIRDLSLAURIE 8/13/2012 10:14AM

    Consistent effort and commitment to caring for self are the keys, aren't they? Thank you for blogging and inspiring us.

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JUDE62AM 8/13/2012 10:10AM

  Way to go!! emoticon

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DALEROG 8/13/2012 10:06AM

  Great writing and kudos to you! I think I'm going to have to subscribe to your blog as well as Leah's.... you guys are both such an inspiration!
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PATTISTAMPS 8/13/2012 10:02AM

    I am inspired by your blog - thank you for sharing, and thanks to LDRichel for pointing me here! Keep that spark BURNING!!!!!

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TURNINGTABLES21 8/13/2012 9:58AM

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ARDISSA 8/13/2012 9:54AM

    Thank you for taking the time to write your blog! It is so inspiring.
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MAGGIEROSEBOWL 8/13/2012 9:30AM

    Great blog! We have indeed reclaimed our lives. My confidence has absolutely soared as I have seen all I can do when I set my mind to it. Even in my dealings with other people I am no longer Casper Milquetoast! I stand up for myself and even better, it doesn't bother me nearly as much when people get upset with something I have or have NOT done. I feel like I have done what is best for ME, and if they don't like it, so be it. As a morbidly obese woman I felt like a second class citizen. I didn't feel worthy of anything and felt like life was passing me by and I deserved that fate because of my inability to get my eating under control. Now when I see what I can accomplish and what I HAVE accomplished I have this huge sense of pride and joy.

I was just thinking this morning on my way to work--that college degree I worked so hard for almost 40 years ago will finally pay off, as I am going to be able to make some nice money when I retire in 4 months, by doing a little substitute teaching, and I'm talking about maybe one day per week! A friend of mine is struggling with her retirement decision. She is a few months older than me, but will not be able to afford to retire when she hits 62 next month. She is thinking about looking for a part-time job. I know how part-time jobs pay--maybe minimum wage if you're lucky. And then I realized that having that degree is going to help me FINALLY! It makes me feel good that something I achieved so long ago and thought all these years was just a worthless piece of paper, is ultimately going to benefit my husband and me! But I never would have been brave enough to attempt substitute teaching, had I not lost 175 lbs.!

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FARIS71 8/13/2012 9:18AM

    Gosh that is awesome - the content and they style of your writing are so wonderful to read! Thank you for sharing.

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MAMAT2012 8/13/2012 9:07AM

  Most all of us on this journey let the voice in our heads that says " you have failed before and will fail again" overcome the strength it took to start yet again. With each journey we learn--- sometimes a little sometimes a lot. Very inspiring blog. T



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DJSHIP46 8/13/2012 8:59AM

    Thanks for the advice!

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NEWMOM20121 8/13/2012 8:48AM

    Well done.

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SUE8989 8/13/2012 8:42AM

  How inspiring... Thanks!

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NHEMBERGER 8/13/2012 8:21AM

    emoticon

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PENOWOK 8/13/2012 8:03AM

    Well written despite the midnight shift and use of phone! Ha! Excellent thinking...
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Comment edited on: 8/13/2012 8:03:42 AM

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OILERFAN84 8/13/2012 7:47AM

  right on and well said

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TORTISE110 8/13/2012 7:40AM

    Way to go!

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AJB121299 8/13/2012 7:28AM

    kudos

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HEATHER3477 8/13/2012 7:25AM

    emoticon

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CLUMBOY 8/13/2012 7:23AM

    beautifully said. congratulations. i wish you every happiness. you don't know how many people have been touched by these words.

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BRASKIN 8/13/2012 7:13AM

  thanks for the boost .... emoticon

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BESSHAILE 8/13/2012 6:56AM

    congratulations on your new found freedom!

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BD3269PM 8/13/2012 5:51AM

    emoticon Great!!! emoticon

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AWAKENBRANDNEW 8/13/2012 4:57AM

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NUMD97 8/13/2012 3:43AM

    "Each time I honor a commitment to myself to exercise when I dont feel like it, or work through a problem and see it through, something inside grows stronger."

This is simply fabulous, Robert!

Thank you for posting and for continuing to inspire us.

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TDWANDD2MYK9 8/13/2012 3:34AM

    Fab blog! emoticon Just emoticon

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JAZZIE28 8/13/2012 2:58AM

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BLOOMING52 8/13/2012 2:16AM

    Thank you! Tap on!

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GOSPARK45 8/13/2012 1:26AM

    You certainly have gotten strong. Way to be.

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SHORTTOOTH1 8/12/2012 10:53PM

    How Inspirational. Thanks the boost!

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MARITIMER3 8/12/2012 10:22PM

    Your blogs always give me a boost! You are so determined, and you have learned so much about yourself. Thank you for sharing your story so honestly.

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LYNDALOVES2HIKE 8/12/2012 10:19PM

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IRONBLOSSOM 8/12/2012 10:07PM

    You're so awesome!

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CORINA-MOMOF4 8/12/2012 9:53PM

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SUSIEMT 8/12/2012 9:16PM

    Yeah Robert! Keep up the good work man!

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