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    HALFWRITTEN   4,169
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Day 8

Saturday, August 11, 2012

2 more days to go!

Yesterdayand this morning I took a break from my phone, magazines, tv and the internet. It was hard. I didn't realize how much I bombard myself with outside images and messages until I took a break. The first three hours were the absolute worst.

After a while it got a bit better, but it wasn't until late that evening that I really started to enjoy being free from technology. I wrote 1,000 words in a young Adult novel I've been putting off. This morning I got a lot of cleaning done in the house and felt much better about myself. I was practically glowing.

I'm going to take media fasts here and there in the fututre. There are times I won't be able to do it, because my job as a journalist requires that I stay up to date on events. A day once a month or once ebery other month would be refreshing to for my soul and creativity.

Here's the quote for todays challenge:

“If you hear a voice within you saying, You are not a painter, then by all means paint and that voice
will be silenced.”
-Vincent Van Gogh

I love this quote, especially since it was VIncent Van Gogh. He's my favorite painter in the entire world. Honestly the quote could have said "That's not my shoe," and i would have been giddy over the quote.

Today's challenge was to pay attention to my thoughts. This became a little easier after the media fast. Even if I din't want to listen to some of my thoughts, fears, anxieties. By taking time to pay attention to my thoughts and letting them say their piece, a lot of them felt less scary.

I'm far from being ready to live in the present moment and taking my thoughts without judgement, but at least progress is being made.

ANother part of the challenge was to take the negative thoughts and scrutinize them. Whenever I do this, I can see holes in my angsty fears.

When I used to freak out as a teenager-which happened more often than I'd like to admit, but not nearly as much as my dad would claim-my mom would sit down and have me talk out my fear.
Then she'd make me describe the worst thing that could possibly happen. I grew up in a theatrical family, so I could come up with some pretty impressive and torturous stories.

No matter how dire I made them sound, there was always a silver lining or way my mom could show me that it wasn't the end of the world.

I think my thoughts need that mothering voice. The one who says, o.k. I know this feels bad, but what's the absolute worst thing that could happen...now how likely is that scenario...and so on, until I'm seeing my negative thoughts for the fabrications that they are.

Today i feel empowered and beautiful. I am stronger than I give myself credit for. If I tell someone no, because I need to say no, it won't be a disaster.



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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUSTYNA7 9/11/2012 2:54PM

    Nice. I think I missed that mothering voice growing up.... but I'm good at providing it to my kids. Can I give it to myself? THis is a thing worth thinking about. Thanks for the blog.

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EVIE4NOW 8/11/2012 11:14PM

  No can be an excellent word. emoticon

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