Friday, August 10, 2012
It's odd how no matter what we SEEM to think, if we're not at the point in our lives where we are ready for something to happen it is just NOT going to happen. I originally joined SP about 6 years ago. I was all "gung ho" at first. I though I'm ready, I want this, I'm giong to make it happen. Yeah right. Here I am 6 years later starting all over. But the time is different, the mindset is different, the feeling is different. I didn't even know what I truely wanted 6 years ago. Ok, so to a point I was just wanting to look better. But now I want to FEEL better. I want to work better. I want to BE better. I want to be healthy. I DON'T want to turn 40 and still be the me I was 6 years ago. Counseling is what started the change this year. I didn't want to feel miserable about myself anymore and I knew that I wasn't going to quit feeling that way by myself. I have come to learn, and readily admit, some of us just can't do EVERYTHING on our own. The best part is we don't have to. That's why we're ALL here. I only recently got active on SP again. That's actually one of the reasons I know this time is different. I want to know how to do things on here. I've learned how. I've read message boards and left comments and joined a challenge. I made my first friends. Lol. I don't want to feel alone anymore. I want to connect with people. And hey, I LIKE getting points. LOL. I'm ok with not being perfect all the and not beating myself up if I do something "bad". And I like being ok with that. It feels ALOT better. So for now I'm active every day (working on being more active), I cook and clean for my family and still study my classes every day but I make time to take my dog for a walk. I managed to quit smoking last October 16th and I have lost 10lbs. I am happy where I am, which feels great and odd to say at the same time. I've never felt it before. I know it's different this time. If I can go into McDonald's and look at the calorie chat and pick something I've never tried before and LIKE it, things have changed! I have finally let it become MY time. So look out now!