Hello my Sparkie friends! Thanks for stopping by and reading my TeddyBear babble, hee hee. I'm so happy I have you all in my life (Thank-you Spark People!).
** Sorry this one is a little lengthy...
August 6, 2012...
So yesterday was a very hard day for my family. I know there have been and will be harder days, but this was one of them.
To start off, where we live is the "poorer" part of our town, but we love it! We don't have the house with a "West & East wing" and we are good with that... hee hee. But there was this house right around the corner from us that Papa Bear and I would dream of having. It was still a ranch style house, but had the garage he wanted and a big barn in the back (he could make his work shop). The Cubs would love the in ground pool and diving board and even though there was only one bathroom still, I looked forward to having a space for a dining room finally and a nice deck. We don't need the big house... just more to clean in my eyes... but this would give us the little bit more we needed.
So about a year after us driving by and saying how that's a house we like, it went on the market. Hubby called and just for fun, we went to see if it was something we might even like. They had updated it and it looked very nice. Next we looked into if we could even get it. Ends up with the economy, we would have to take some time and get things paid off and then look into it again.
Okay, so now for another year, we drove by it everyday and my cubs and I would pray... "please wait of us... We love you house... God listen to our prayers.... etc". I had made it very clear to the cubs that this was a big "maybe" because it could always sell.
Every time I drove by I looked to see if the owners... who now live in another house... were there. I kept saying I would stop and talk to them, but each time I saw them, I was running to an appointment or something. Next time, I'd say.
So almost a year on the market, they took down the sign and we hoped they gave up and maybe would decide to just rent it, like their neighbor was doing now. We had done our home work and found out that they inherited the house, so they didn't have any payments (other then taxes). Small world, we also found out that my FIL built the little addition and the barn in the back. The couple who lived there had no children, so they would invite my husband (who was very young) and his sibling to come swimming in the pool. My MIL said they passed and she had thought they left the house to a niece... which brings us to the owners now.
Now we come to yesterday...
As we left for church, the owners were there again. I prayed to God to have them still there when we get back and have them in the garage, so we could stop and talk to them. We had a wonderful mass, my younger cub asked the priest all his questions he had and we left church later then usual. I had forgotten about them being at the house till we were coming around the corner. Hubby drove by slowly and I noticed two guys were in the front sipping on ice coffees. We drove home, sat in the car and discussed if we should go back? What would we say? Is it right to? All I knew is I had a strong feeling I needed to go back, so we did. As we drove that short distance, we talked about what we would say.
We get out, explain why we are there and get hit with the news... the house is being sold to a lady. They are closing this Wednesday. My heart just dropped. I tried very hard to not cry. I had prepared my cubs and I for this day, so I had to be strong! We talked for a good 15 - 20 minutes with the owner. He was VERY nice. He even joked if she didn't buy it for any reason Wednesday he'll tie something on the mail box for us to know.
I would have to say after the first shock of it was gone... this dream... I was doing much better. The oldest cub was mad, but we talked it out and they seem to be okay. I saw it as a sign to now do the little things I wanted to do at my house (wasn't doing it because I thought we might move). Hubby though, he was affected the most. He was the one who never dreamed about it... got mad when ever I did. He laughed at us as we prayed ever time we drove by... he would tell me to let the dream go! Now he's the one who kept bringing it up that evening (how sad it was it was sold now). He acted and seemed very depressed. All that went through my mind was "I praise God for when the good things happen and even when they don't go my way." I TRUST and believe in God and I have to believe it didn't happen because there is something better out there for us. He has a plan and it was not this, and I will be fine with it! My husband tried to agree and think this way too, but it was hard.
I love the movie, Facing The Giants. Some people say it's cheesy... too religious, etc. But to me it is a way to look at life. To try to live that way... trust, love and believe in God! I do! Anyways, in the movie the lady is trying to get pregnant. ******spoiler so don't read if you don't want to know******* She goes to the doctors office may times and is told she's not pregnant. Then she starts trusting God and living a better life with him. She goes again to the doctor's office and is told once again, Not pregnant. They show he leaving and she stops to pray and say "I still love you". Just then the nurse comes out and lets her know they messed up the results and she was indeed pregnant! Yes, it's a movie, Hollywood's happy ending, but it shows us that God can do anything he wants. Can change anything... good or bad. So after I "lost" this dream house, I stopped and prayed to God. I thanked him for the dream, for knowing there is something better out there for me and my family. I told him I trust him and still love him!
A song comes to mind too... Unanswered Prayers, from Garth Brooks. Some day I might be thanking God for not answering that prayer, because what he had waiting for me was much better!!!
I'm not going to lie, I'm still very sad and will be for a little while... I am human, hee hee. But I trust and love my God and believe in him and he'll take care of me and my family. Thank-you God!
I love you every much and will always love you. I believe in you! I trust you! I will follow you down this wonderful path of my life you have chosen for me. I thank-you for all you have given to me and my family, and know we still love you!