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WW - 100 pounds ago...

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Saturday, August 04, 2012

Today I'm having one of those days where I'm pretending to do work but thinking about just about everything else. One of the things that popped into my mind was the first time I joined Weight Watchers. My BFF at the time and I decided we needed to lose some weight. We were both single and convinced that our weight was why.

We located a meeting, paid all the fees and had that first weigh-in. Imagine my shock that I weighed 214 pounds!! My friend weighed 160. I remember feeling so embarrassed. For the first time in my life, someone besides my doctor knew what I weighed. My friend was nice and not judgmental. I think she tried to make me feel better by saying something like "You don't look like you weigh that much.".

Each week we would track our food and maybe exercise. Happy Hour was a popular thing for us to do at least once a week. So to fit it in we'd go to the bar, not eat or eat a salad, and then drink. (Yeah. Not too intelligent or mature.)

We were not concerned with being healthy. We just wanted a smaller weight and smaller clothes. Well, no we didn't. We wanted a date. We thought the smaller weight and smaller clothes would bring us men and all the happiness that goes with love. (Yeah. Feel free to laugh.)

So each week the routine looked like this: count food, go to Happy Hour, exercise and eat very light on the day before and of weigh-in, weigh-in and then celebrate or drown our sorrows in a high-calorie/high-fat meal after leaving the WW meeting.

Huh??!! This seemed so smart and like we were beating the system. Now I just shake my head. Needless to say, we didn't get smaller and quit WW.

I do wish I would have absorbed the information presented and tried to educate myself. Maybe I wouldn't have lost and gained the same 150 pounds over the years. Maybe I would have had more self-confidence. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

There is one thing that has stuck with me from WW. At one of the meetings the leader had everyone go around the room and say why they were there and why they wanted to lose weight. One of the ladies said "I don't want people to look at me in my casket and say 'She had such a beautiful face.'". When I was younger I didn't fully get the impact of this statement. Ya know, being young and invincible and all. Now that I'm older and those my age are having health related illnesses and even death, I get it.

Well, the facts are the facts and history is just that, history. I do think about it from time-to-time as I think it's important to assess so that you can improve. I don't dwell and try very hard not to succumb to "shoulda, coulda, woulda's". So here I am 100 pounds heavier than I was then. I'm much more mature and much more educated. I want to be healthy and a good role model. And I want people to see me for all that I've done, am and not just my face. I feel well on my way and much stronger and confident than the young girl I was.

I'm starting to think there is total truth in the statement "We get better with age." I may be heavier but I'm definitely better in so many ways.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHARITY1973 8/20/2012 4:51AM

    My favorite song that my partner plays for me goes, "Like a lovingly aged bottle of wine, you're 39. You're beautiful. You're mine." Always makes me feel warm and fuzzy. Youth is wasted on the young. I wouldn't wanna go back even for the clear skin.

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LELERS 8/15/2012 11:47AM

    Thanks for sharing! I think about these things all the time (outsmarting the system...)!!
Though as I've been reading on this site, as long as the foods you eat aren't incredibly bad for you, fluctuating your calorie intake will help stir up your metabolism. This makes me feel a lot better about the days that I eat more than my recommended amount of calories and also when I don't seem to eat that much.

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ELECTRICITY3699 8/14/2012 9:36AM

    We do get better with age :) We gain knowledge and begin to use it. You are wiser and so much stronger than you were. You are so encouraging girl!

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MISSLISA1973 8/12/2012 9:01AM

    emoticon

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THESLIMMERME1 8/11/2012 1:52AM

    emoticon Comments
I've been there too.
Now to a normal healthy lifestyle.
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LKB008 8/11/2012 1:07AM

    I just recently canceled my WW membership for the third time. My new mantra . . . If it works keep doing it. If it doesn't work do something different. So here I am!

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JOYFULROAD 8/10/2012 11:20PM

  totally relate - I think I have joined WW 3 or 4 times, each time thinking - this will be the time, but its not - taking the slow and smart approach now. I even have to go rustle up a few more carbs before bed - I've never had to do that before!


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MAMA_CD 8/10/2012 7:49PM

    You are a pretty face, but so much more than that, a wise woman with a future of health unfolding before you. emoticon

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IWILLRUN83 8/10/2012 10:01AM

    I loved your blog! I know exactly what you mean. We can do this we are worth it.

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NURSELAUREN 8/9/2012 11:43PM

    emoticon emoticon

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DEQUINTA 8/9/2012 10:27PM

    GREAT BLOG! THANKS FOR SHARING! IT COULD BE THE LIFE STORY OF SO MANY OF US! WE ARE ON A BETTER ROAD NOW! GOOD LUCK!

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FATBASTICH 8/9/2012 8:51AM

    George Sheehan said we're all experiments of one. Congratulations on the self-knowledge you gained through these experiences.

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TRYINGHARD54 8/9/2012 8:45AM

    great blog.. I had to laugh,because i thought about the same thing when I die and people look at me. lol,

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GARDENCHRIS 8/9/2012 7:14AM

    this is why it is called life, we get smarter! You can do it, we have all been there and then some.

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NILANDHOO 8/9/2012 3:31AM

    Your story is just like my first experience of WW. Lose two pounds and celebrate at the chip shop on the way back to the car! Good luck with your journey, thanks for the stroll down emery lane.

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JEN_BACK2BASICS 8/8/2012 10:49PM

    I joined WW with my mom when I was 13 years old. I think about that now and then and wonder how much it contributed to the continued gain that plagued me until I too reached 100 pounds heavier than I was then. We all need to find our own way through this journey, and I'm so proud that you are finding your way and using your voice to inspire others. We can do this, girl. One day at a time.
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JO88BAKO 8/8/2012 10:08PM

    Awesome!!

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KRISCOREEVES 8/8/2012 9:27PM

    Thanks for sharing! emoticon

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WILMA42 8/8/2012 8:57PM

    Thanks for sharing your journey.

Just Keep taking one step at a time & make sure youremember to do it for the right reasons - better health and being happy with who you are -- Peace :)


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DINGALLSTOO 8/8/2012 5:49PM

    Funny I went to WW as a teen, with my bff. It didn't work for us at that time either! Best wishes for continued success. Great blog

Comment edited on: 8/8/2012 5:50:42 PM

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MAMACITADEBI 8/8/2012 5:25PM

    Thanks for sharing. My biggest "wake up call" to having way too much extra weight, was when my blood pressure was way too high and I had a TIA. Very scary.

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JANETTEB553 8/8/2012 5:21PM

    emoticon

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KRISTENMBATT 8/8/2012 4:15PM

    Funny blog, yup some of that sounds familiar.

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TORTISE110 8/8/2012 4:09PM

    Thank you for this honest post!

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GIRLONFIRE1979 8/8/2012 12:24PM

    I truly loved this blog Stephanie...Made me feel all warm inside. I love you just the way you are right now!

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JULIA1154 8/7/2012 8:33PM

  Thanks for a thoughtful (and amusing) blog.

I would bet that at this point in your life you have a much deeper appreciation of the benefits of losing weight and living fit. I suspect you'll not only value the journey but also maintain your loss once you get there. Stay tough!

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KIN59VARA 8/7/2012 7:18PM

    Good for you!

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GABIGAIL5 8/7/2012 6:53PM

  You're in it for the right reasons now, girl! Go for it! I believe you're going to reach those goals even though it won't always be easy.

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MOMMY445 8/7/2012 5:46PM

    what a great blog! thanks for sharing!

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CHEROKEE1946 8/7/2012 4:30PM

    Great Blog and I know all the feeling and have said them all and been there with the WW meetings. Glad you put it into words and All I had to do was read, relate, and then agree. Have a great day.

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CREOLE24 8/7/2012 1:19PM

    I have tried WW the online version a few years ago. It was working counting points and all, but I fell off. I like that this format is almost a mirror image to WW online and it's FREE!

When I was a chubby fat kid, people always commented on how long and beautiful my hair was. The "Ice Cream Lady" who sold ice creams at recess was absent and her fill in commented on how pretty my skin was. What a nice "new" compliment.

I later realized it's how people try to find something nice to say about the fat kid after that have said how beautiful the kid in front of the fat kid is.

After reading your post, I am thinking I understand exactly what you mean.

Kudos for you for being her and good luck. emoticon

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GALINAZ 8/7/2012 1:05PM

    oh my flashback! I did the same thing with TOPS, barely eating before weigh-in and stopping for a burger on the way home from the meeting! The comment about having a pretty face smacked me up side the head! Thanks for a wonderfully honest blog

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NELLBELLA26 8/7/2012 12:44PM

    Wow. I love how honest you are about why you started Weight Watchers in the firt place. I think a lot of us think that weight loss is going to lead to the ever elusive happiness and attention from people. But in reality, weight loss alone doesn't allow for happiness or health. That comes from a whole, mind body soul connection which you seem to have grasped. We can't be happy and healthy until each part of us is fulfilled and on track.

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HHB4181 8/7/2012 12:35PM

    great blog! my, how things change....

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MAGGIEROSEBOWL 8/7/2012 12:26PM

    I love the lady's comment about people looking in her casket and saying, "She had such a pretty face." A horrible fantasy I had was the struggle they would have carrying my casket with fat old me inside and yes, of people saying exactly the same thing about me, "She had such a pretty face," or worse, "If only she'd been able to lose some weight." Dumb to worry about stuff hurting your dignity when you're dead, but I've had every thought known to man (or woman) about being obese over the years. I remember when I started losing weight, and then had to have an MRI for a mass in my abdomen (turned out to be a hernia), I told hubby if I DO have cancer, make sure people know I WORKED HARD to lose this weight, I didn't lose it because I was sick.
It's pretty apparent--that we all think alike. Sometimes we are not ready to accept the changes we need to make to lose and keep off the weight when we are very young. Thank Goodness, some of us finally come to our senses!

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CATDUG19 8/7/2012 11:23AM

    Fantastic blog!! I know I have been on the weight loss roller coaster thinking of just getting smaller would make me happy. You are so right that hopefully with age comes wisdom. I lol when I read the WW meeting then huge fat heavy dinner (did that with a buddy for close to one year and could not figure out why we were gaining weight.)

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EILEENXO 8/7/2012 11:19AM

    Thanks for sharing. I love how silly we can be at times in our lives. I'm glad you're hindsight has improved and you are no longer shocked that you weren't either succesfull at WW or reeling in the men based solely on weight. lol

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NIQUE85 8/7/2012 11:08AM

    emoticon

I can relate to this in so many ways.

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TBOGENER 8/7/2012 10:21AM

    emoticon

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BANDMOM2012 8/7/2012 10:18AM

    The journey to healthy is finding what works for you. I really like the community of Spark, but the simplicity of WW nutrition. Both are working for me. I first joined WW over a decade ago to lose weight for a class reunion and I did. Here I am at my heaviest, and I am going back to what works for me. Here's to making this journey together and making it count!

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JUDSTERF 8/7/2012 9:30AM

    Great blog!!! I did the WW thing too. Lots 50# and regained that plus more. Spark is much better for me. It's coming off slowly but I'm not gaining - - slow and steady goes the pace as they say. I am feeling better about myself for the most part and am learning things new every day.

Judy emoticon

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KPETSCHE 8/7/2012 7:34AM

    I read your blog and thought about my sister who has struggled with her weight since college. She has joined weight watchers so many times that I've lost count. I've tried to hint to her about SparkPeople and the help that I've gotten. I hope at some point she is willing to try something else because she does the same thing and the weight leaves and comes back over and over again. I had thought about checking out Weight Watchers online but found this site at about that point and have been so pleased with everything that's available. Good luck with your healthy journey.

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CAROLZ1967 8/7/2012 7:04AM

    Great blog! You write so well. Although I don't really like getting older, I do feel tons better about myself, my goals, my attitude, finding real passions in life, etc. You have that great attitude and outlook on life too! I believe you will be successful at this healthy lifestyle journey too. Getting the "mental" part correct is such a huge part of it, to really be successful LONG-term anyway. :-)

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RNINNC 8/7/2012 3:42AM

  Can relate totally emoticon

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TAMPATINK67 8/7/2012 12:40AM

    I resemble these remarks!

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STACYJANE77 8/7/2012 12:32AM

    I can so relate to this!


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GABIBEAR 8/6/2012 11:35PM

    Stephanie - I think many people can relate to your blog about losing and gaining the weight back. I too have done this, joined WW followed the calorie guide disregarding the nutrition part, lost 50 lbs, gained back the 50 lbs and gaining back + 15 more.

We do get better with age - I think I am a really fine Merlot and moving into being a vintage Cabernet. emoticon

Good luck with the rest of your journey! Don't forget - if you REALLY picture yourself as the healthy weight you deserve to be and if you REALLY plan your lifestyle accordingly, you will achieve success! emoticon

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BLOOMING52 8/6/2012 11:33PM

    Thank you.

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SGOODRICHTX3221 8/6/2012 10:28PM

    I loved that. It was beautifully written

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JBECKS626 8/6/2012 10:05PM

    Beautifully written. I truly appreciate your honesty; thanks for sharing!
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