Saturday, August 04, 2012
Today I'm having one of those days where I'm pretending to do work but thinking about just about everything else. One of the things that popped into my mind was the first time I joined Weight Watchers. My BFF at the time and I decided we needed to lose some weight. We were both single and convinced that our weight was why.
We located a meeting, paid all the fees and had that first weigh-in. Imagine my shock that I weighed 214 pounds!! My friend weighed 160. I remember feeling so embarrassed. For the first time in my life, someone besides my doctor knew what I weighed. My friend was nice and not judgmental. I think she tried to make me feel better by saying something like "You don't look like you weigh that much.".
Each week we would track our food and maybe exercise. Happy Hour was a popular thing for us to do at least once a week. So to fit it in we'd go to the bar, not eat or eat a salad, and then drink. (Yeah. Not too intelligent or mature.)
We were not concerned with being healthy. We just wanted a smaller weight and smaller clothes. Well, no we didn't. We wanted a date. We thought the smaller weight and smaller clothes would bring us men and all the happiness that goes with love. (Yeah. Feel free to laugh.)
So each week the routine looked like this: count food, go to Happy Hour, exercise and eat very light on the day before and of weigh-in, weigh-in and then celebrate or drown our sorrows in a high-calorie/high-fat meal after leaving the WW meeting.
Huh??!! This seemed so smart and like we were beating the system. Now I just shake my head. Needless to say, we didn't get smaller and quit WW.
I do wish I would have absorbed the information presented and tried to educate myself. Maybe I wouldn't have lost and gained the same 150 pounds over the years. Maybe I would have had more self-confidence. Maybe, maybe, maybe.
There is one thing that has stuck with me from WW. At one of the meetings the leader had everyone go around the room and say why they were there and why they wanted to lose weight. One of the ladies said "I don't want people to look at me in my casket and say 'She had such a beautiful face.'". When I was younger I didn't fully get the impact of this statement. Ya know, being young and invincible and all. Now that I'm older and those my age are having health related illnesses and even death, I get it.
Well, the facts are the facts and history is just that, history. I do think about it from time-to-time as I think it's important to assess so that you can improve. I don't dwell and try very hard not to succumb to "shoulda, coulda, woulda's". So here I am 100 pounds heavier than I was then. I'm much more mature and much more educated. I want to be healthy and a good role model. And I want people to see me for all that I've done, am and not just my face. I feel well on my way and much stronger and confident than the young girl I was.
I'm starting to think there is total truth in the statement "We get better with age." I may be heavier but I'm definitely better in so many ways.